It is commonly believed that nowadays main factors that affect a child's development are media, pop culture and friends. A different point of view is that family plays the most significant role. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There occurs differences when it comes to defining the significant factors which affect the growth of adolescents. It is believed by most people that a child's development is influenced by surrounding factors
such
as journalism, western culture as well as friends, whereas others opine that in the upbringing of a toddler, family plays an indispensable role. I am personally inclined towards the
second
opinion. Commencing with the most prominent reason why children's evolution is affected by technologies and their peers in the modern era. With the advancement in automation, youngsters are falling into the trap of digital media, because at that age, they could not be realised what is real and what is fake. They tend to copy the western culture, as they spend most of their time not only scrolling social media but
also
hanging out with their friends.
Therefore
, the high exposer to electronic media has influenced offspring's personality to great extent. Apart from that, the fellows and journalism like magazines and newspaper
also
have made a great impact on child's growth.
However
, the upbringing of an infant is the prime responsibility of the family. Parents do their best to teach moral and cultural values as well as the significance of rituals to their offspring.
Besides
, a juvenile
also
received many life lessons by watching and following their family members.
For instance
, parents educate the child how to respect others, treat others equally despite their financial status as well communication skills.
Thus
, the family guide their pupils in either direct or indirect ways. To conclude,
although
surrounding factors has a major impact on toddlers' development, from my perspective, parents guidance plays a vital role in the successful growth of the children.
Submitted by mp960021 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • influence
  • development
  • media
  • pop culture
  • peers
  • family
  • social skills
  • beliefs
  • values
  • emotional support
  • moral guidance
  • aspirations
  • self-image
  • social development
  • value system
  • harmony
  • conflict
  • significant
  • behaviors
What to do next:
Look at other essays: