Some people do not go directly to college but travel or work for a short time. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

During these modern days,

students

have an opportunity to earn before even completing their academic calendar due to technology.Some individuals get employed or go on a vacation for a limited time rather than going to

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

college as soon.The drawbacks are more than merits since the

students

have a high chance of early marriage and dropping out of

school

Firstly

,learners who travel or work before attending college find themselves having responsibilities just by the touch of money.

This

is because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

ideally they end up getting married.Due to the technology being prominent that they get exposed in a way they forget about education.

In addition

,just being away from the learning environment keep the thought of going back to

school

away.

For example

,in 2019 the star newspapers reported that public vehicle conductors are

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

four leavers with high grades.

Therefore

,it is apparent that the exposure of not going on with schooling is high once the scholar travel or work before going to an institute.

Secondly

,dropping out of

school

is a major consequence especially when an undergraduate has tasted money that they feel held on from earning or going for vacations.

Consequently

,they perform badly as their interest is disrupted from the usual flow of being in a learning environment,

For example

,in

Rwanda

Add a comma

,Rwanda

show examples

the government published a policy in 2021 for the transition of

students

from secondary to university.Indeed,in the modern world

comparing

Change the form of the verb

compared

show examples

to traditional times

school

dropout is high and again many

students

in higher learning are multitasking. To sum up,the society stopped reporting immediately to university rather

Change preposition

than go

show examples

abroad or labour for a short time has led to several scholars be multitasking due to many

resposibility

Correct your spelling

responsibility

Submitted by Sabina Hamisi on Sun Dec 12 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

gap year
self-discovery
character-building
enhanced
independence
adaptability
interpersonal skills
open-mindedness
global perspective
delayed
employment prospects
financial burden
educational attainment

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Beside a lot of advantages, some people believe that the Internet creates many problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Over the last few years, internet is becomes one of the most controversial topics among people in the twenty-first century.l believe that it has a lot of advantages as well as some drawbacks.l do not ignore that because the web is a dangerous place and it is out of control.
5
band
Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?
Expensive price of medications has caused mortality, as many people in poor countries cannot be recovered from curable disease because of the high price. The producers should be responsible for the supply and price of their products. I believe that these companies should provide affordable medications for poor people and this essay will explain my view.
5
band
Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some people believe that children should be taught by their parents about how to function as useful members of society, while others believe that sending children to educational institutions is the best way for them to study this. Although the latter opinion can be beneficial in some cases, I believe that family upbringing plays a more important role in educating children to be good parts of the community.
5
band
Some people think that it’s a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Some persons believe that socialising with co-workers during weekends and evenings is recommended. However, other people think it is necessary to separate work and social life.
<4
band
Some people think that the best way to run a business is within the family, while others find a family-run business unsuccessful. Discuss both opinions and present your own.
The operation and ownership of family businesses are prevalent in many countries. While some individuals perceive this as an ideal method of managing a business, others consider that it has several difficulties. In the essay, we will examine both perspectives and argue that while family ownership has its benefits, it may lead to inherent problems that can hinder sustainable business growth.

Some people do not go directly to college but travel or work for a short time. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Your opinion

Beside a lot of advantages, some people believe that the Internet creates many problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that it’s a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the best way to run a business is within the family, while others find a family-run business unsuccessful. Discuss both opinions and present your own.