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Band 5.5

Some people believe that the aim of university education is to help graduates get better job. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #aim #university #education #graduates #job #individuals #society
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Helping graduates to get a decent
job
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 seems
as
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like
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 the chief purpose
from
Change preposition
of
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university
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education
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.
However
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, I strongly believe that more advantages can be discovered to benefit both individuals and society. On the one hand, those who received a high-level
education
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 are more likely to have a competitive edge in
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job
Add an article
the job
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 market. Today, a wide variety of subjects have been inducted into
school’s
Correct article usage
the school’s
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 curriculum,
such
Linking Words
 as: Psy-chology、Accounting、Science Technology and so forth, which can
ex-tremely
Correct your spelling
extremely
 expand
student’s
Fix the agreement mistake
students’
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 academic skills. After graduating,
university
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 students are easier to attain a
job
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 in
prestigious
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a prestigious
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 business company. Without a desirable
job
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, the knowledge and skills that they
learnt
Wrong verb form
learned
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in
Change preposition
on
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 campus would not be exerted.
This
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 may cause
the
Correct article usage
a
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 reduction of
interests
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interest
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 in
academic
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
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 and
lose
Replace the word
loss
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 sense of achievement.
Hence
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, laying emphasis on how to get a better
job
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 is of vital significance.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are more advantages that students can benefit from
university
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.
To begin
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 with, they can improve the ability of
Correct your spelling
individual
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in-dividual
Correct your spelling
individual
show examples
 development. Attending activities in college would be a prime opportunity to boost their communication skills and creative imagination.
for example
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 :debate competition、artificial intelligent robot contest.
In addition
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, from the perspective of society,
university
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education
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also
Linking Words
 helps students to develop higher moral standard,
this
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 is because they can learn politics and law.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in the future, it is not difficult to imagine our society will be consisted of more polite and knowledgeable people. To some degree, it will be likely to alleviate crime rate. In conclusion, I accept that to get a better
job
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 is the priority from
university
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education
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, yet the potential benefits should be highlighted.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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