Children can learn effectively by watching television. Therefore they should be encouraged to watch television both at home and at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With the development of technology, the media has played a pivotal role in the field of education.

Therefore

, many people are of the opinion that students will be taught better and understand the subjects in a more productive way through watching

in school and at home .

although

learning through

has some benefits. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will be discussing why I believe that it may affect the youngsters in a negative way.

To begin

with, childhood is the period of our life where we can enjoy

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

simple pleasures

such

as running around with friends, climbing trees, pursuing adventures and many more. But in our

present

Add a hyphen

present-day

show examples

day

Add a comma

,day

show examples

most

children

are glued to televisions and computers spending almost all their free time watching cartoons or playing video games.

Therefore

, if we introduce

as a teaching tool

children

will be in constant contact with television which will lead to many health issues

such

as obesity and damaged eyesight.

Moreover

, when

children

watch

in school and home they will become addicted and having it as an educational tool will be an excuse for them to spend more time in front of

Add an article

the tv

show examples

furthermore

, television

broadcast

Fix the agreement mistake

broadcasts

show examples

many programmes that contain

considerable

Add an article

a considerable

show examples

amount of

violent

Replace the word

violence

show examples

that may instigate them to behave in a bad or antisocial way. To sum up , watching

may help students in their education. We can not

dany

Correct your spelling

deny

that

this phenomena

Change the determiner

this phenomenon

these phenomena

show examples

will bring more disadvantages that could affect

children

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

later on in their adult life .

Submitted by ph.amal.just on Tue Dec 14 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

passive
sedentary
limit
creativity
imagination
educational content
expose
different cultures
perspectives
negative effects
behavior

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Children can learn effectively by watching television. Therefore they should be encouraged to watch television both at home and at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Education is the single most important factor for a developing country. Do you agree or disagree

Nowadays, traffic is a serious problem in big cities. Why this is so and what effects does it bring? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think that sport has significant impact on the society, others think that sport is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.