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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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According to
Linking Words
 the chart, we see how
water
Use synonyms
 usage purposes are distributed among the world’s different
areas
Use synonyms
. It seems like some parts of the world are using
water
Use synonyms
 mostly for industrial purposes and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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other parts require
water
Use synonyms
 just in order to sustain their agricultural needs. The
areas
Use synonyms
 where the
water
Use synonyms
 is being used mostly for
industry
Add an article
the industry
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 are North America and Europe.
This
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 is not a surprising outcome considering
the
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apply
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both
areas
Use synonyms
’ contribution to the world’s industrial sectors. The rest of the
areas
Use synonyms
 given in the chart are using
water
Use synonyms
 for agricultural purposes. Even though their usage percentages seem quite similar, Central Asia seems to be the most
water
Use synonyms
-consuming area regarding agriculture. It is really an eye-catching fact that South America has the biggest share of domestic
water
Use synonyms
 usage amongst all the
areas
Use synonyms
 given in the chart.
As a result
Linking Words
, we can say that Europe is the most
water
Use synonyms
-needing area of the world in order to sustain their industrial needs
whereas
Linking Words
 Central Asia is the one that requires
water
Use synonyms
 for agricultural needs.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, areas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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