IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010
#two #maps #show #road #access #city
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Two
Correct article usage
The two
show examples
 maps below illustrate access to the
road
Use synonyms
 to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010. As we can see from the maps there were considerable changes made in the
year
Use synonyms
 2010 to the hospital
road
Use synonyms
 connecting to
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
road
Use synonyms
 and
new
Correct article usage
the new
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 parking facility beside the hospital building.
Also
Linking Words
, changes were done at the main entrance by making a roundabout to facilitate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
car parking. Now if we closely look at the prospered changes made in the
year
Use synonyms
 2010, we can see that there are two new roundabouts had been made in the new
road
Use synonyms
 layout design to smooth the flow of the traffic coming from the main city
road
Use synonyms
 towards the hospital, and
also
Linking Words
 a bus station for the public transport.
Whereas
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 was missing in the original layout plan of the hospital in the
year
Use synonyms
 2007.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there was only one place for car parking for the public and for the staff as well,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 had now been built separately. Another noticeable change made in the
year
Use synonyms
 2010 is
the
Correct your spelling
that
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 only
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
bus stop
instead
Linking Words
 of many, as it was in the
year
Use synonyms
 2007.
To sum up
Linking Words
, the new design was made by keeping in mind to smooth the flow of traffic and facilitate the parking for both staff and
ordinary
Correct article usage
the ordinary
show examples
 public.
Submitted by bilalahmadkw on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 86%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words road, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • dual carriageway
  • roundabout
  • traffic flow
  • multi-story car park
  • green spaces
  • pedestrian provisions
  • footpaths
  • traffic signals
  • construction phase
  • ambulances
  • carriageway expansion
  • traffic congestion
  • pedestrian crossings
  • urban planning
  • infrastructure development
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