Some people think that traditional games are better than modern games in helping children develop their abilities. To what extent do you agree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

There is

such

Linking Words

a deep discussion reloving around society whether modern

games

Use synonyms

can create better opportunities for children to carry

further

Linking Words

their abilities or

does it

Verb problem

apply

show examples

keep them away from developing their skills. Traditional

games

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as backgammon and chess have always been the most prominent

games

Use synonyms

that humanity utilised. From my point of view, we should not sacrifice our cultural heritage for modern alternatives.

However

Linking Words

, both modern and traditional

games

Use synonyms

do aid our youth

to upgrade

Change preposition

in upgrading

show examples

their mindsets. In our present-day society, there is

Linking Words

such

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

a considerable majority that believes traditional

games

Use synonyms

have more benefits compared to modern ones. To specialise it more, cultural competitions

such

Linking Words

as chess have been present since

Persian

Correct article usage

the Persian

show examples

Empire, and it is proven that performing at chess transforms our way of thinking tremendously. Apart from that, it

also

Linking Words

prominently educates us about maintaining our patience.

Besides

Linking Words

, our youth would love to play their cultural

games

Use synonyms

. On top of that, traditional

games

Use synonyms

will add cultural satisfaction to our children and prevent them from losing their identity. There are

such

Linking Words

undebatable numbers that agree that new-age

games

Use synonyms

are more stimulant

Change preposition

show examples

child skill development.

In other words

Linking Words

, some present-day

games

Use synonyms

bolster memorising abilities. Having

this

Linking Words

said, they

also

Linking Words

add unique and extended experiences. From my perspective, affirmably, both authentic and modern

games

Use synonyms

let us gaze through our thoughts.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

traditional

Replace the word

tradition

show examples

is more divine and sacred for me. In conclusion, people hold conflicting views about whether modern or authentic

games

Use synonyms

are efficient. Aged

games

Use synonyms

provide

Verb problem

make

show examples

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

aware of our vulnerable history. When it comes to present ones, they greet us with new techniques and methods of playing. Whether new or old, I am convinced that both are beneficial for the youth.

senayxThu Dec 16 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Ensure your argument is consistently clear throughout the essay, especially when balancing the benefits of traditional and modern games.

task achievement

Provide specific examples when discussing how games aid in skill development to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Organize your points more logically, ensuring that each paragraph has a clear central idea and links smoothly with the next.

coherence cohesion

Consider using transition phrases more effectively to guide the reader through your arguments.

coherence cohesion

You have successfully included both an introduction and conclusion, which frames your essay well.

task achievement

Your essay attempts to cover both sides of the argument, acknowledging the benefits of both traditional and modern games.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

285 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Nowadays, more and more people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and effects on the people themselves and their families.
In the present day, many society from various cities do not spend their time with their families. Its causes are the hustle and bustle of life. Although brings many benefits to each individual, it also causes the risk of losing relationships between family members.
6.5
band
The movement of people from villages to cities for work can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems associated with this? What measures can be taken to solve these problems?
Nowadays, is common to move to the main cities, and a lot of people decide to move for work or study, as a result, this creates unbalance in both areas and creates more traffic and crowds in big cities.
6.5
band
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
I agree that children should have a basic understanding of what is right and what is wrong from an early age. When teaching this it doesn't have to cover heavy topics such as serious crimes or social issues, rather it could simply teach them the basics such as manners. It would help immensely in their development of them as people and would be a foundation for who they grow up to be. Teaching children how to behave in front of the public and what is acceptable would also be important so they could fit into society's strict norms. This can help children pick up on social cues and learn why something is and isn't acceptable, which would help them when they start socializing with people outside of their family. Not to mention, learning what is right and wrong can help them build positive habits and would help to prevent the development of negative habits that may hurt others or themselves. However, as we all know, children do not understand everything right away. To ensure they underst...
5
band
Some people believe that tourists should accept social and environment responsibility While others believe that tourists should not accept any responsiblity at all.To what Extend do you agree or disagree.
There is an argument that travelers need to behave well socially as well as maintain environmental quality. Whereas, others argue that there should no any burden to be received by them. I personally agree with the notion that societal and ecological duties need to be considered by tourists.
7.5
band
All education, primary, secondary and further education, should be free to all people and paid for the government. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is argued that access to education at all levels, from primary school to universities, should be provided free of charge to everyone. In my opinion, teaching is a vital tool for personal growth, helping individuals choose their careers and develop their talents. In this essay, I will discuss how governments can support this process.

Some people think that traditional games are better than modern games in helping children develop their abilities. To what extent do you agree?

Nowadays, more and more people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and effects on the people themselves and their families.

The movement of people from villages to cities for work can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems associated with this? What measures can be taken to solve these problems?

Some people believe that tourists should accept social and environment responsibility While others believe that tourists should not accept any responsiblity at all.To what Extend do you agree or disagree.

All education, primary, secondary and further education, should be free to all people and paid for the government. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?