IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by very small numbers of people. Some people say that governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe that would be a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#languages #danger #extinction #numbers #people #governments #money #waste
There are some
languages
, which are going to be overthrown because the number of
people
 who are speaking these
languages
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 few. Some
people
though
Correct your spelling
thought
show examples
, the
government
 should specify a specific amount of public money to save these
languages
,
on the other hand
, other groups of
people
 believe it is just wasting of money. According to my opinion,
this
 is a normal process. Every
language
 and its speakers have a specific time after that time, they are going to be extinct ,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 if we keep the
languages
 alive
that is
 a good idea, which can help a culture related to
language
 to be alive.
Firstly
, the
government
 should put other things
in
Change preposition
as
show examples
priority
Correct article usage
a priority
show examples
.
For instance
, health issues, the
economy
, unemployed
people
 and in the end the issue of culture and
languages
. Because
people
 can't live without some essential staff for life, to say
in other words
, if a
language
demolish
Change the verb form
demolishes
show examples
people
 would be able to continue their life. But if they have problems in regard to health or the
economy
 they would encounter too many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
difficulties.
On the other hand
, if the
government
 work in regards to cultures and
languages
 it can help to have more tourists,which is a good source of income. Because when a
language
 is going to vanish, the culture related to
language
 will
also
 extinct.
Therefore
, the interest of tourists will decrease cause there wouldn't be anything interested in tourism, which has a direct effect on the
economy
 especial in the country, where there most of the income comes from tourism. To sum up the topic,
this
 is not a bad idea to spend money on
languages
 to be alive if the
government
 has a good
economy
 and their income stand on tourism.
Submitted by noorinahakimi5 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: