students should choose a university major that prepares them for a hig-paying job. To what extent do you agree with this satement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Picking an appropriate field of interest has always been a highly controversial issue among enlistments as it is believed to be directly effective on their future . It is often argued that

unversity

Correct your spelling

university

educators ought to select their majors with consideration to the future

profitablity

Correct your spelling

profitability

.I partly agree and disagree with

this

Linking Words

belief. To commence, on the one hand , there is no shadow of a doubt that money has always played a key role in people's lives. There is a pressing need

Change preposition

for

show examples

a source of high income to meet the basic needs in the current modern world. It is

also

Linking Words

assumed that if someone is

financialy

Correct your spelling

financially

supported, reaching the goals might be much more attainable. Needless to say that

this

Linking Words

progess

Correct your spelling

process

progress

should have been planned from the early age of adulthood and schooling . Take Jeff

Bazos

Correct your spelling

Bezos

, as a megarich

exmaple

Correct your spelling

example

, he is the pioneer for stepping into the Moon which has been a milestone in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

human being history. His dreams would have not become into reality if he was not wealthy enough.

Therefore

Linking Words

the role of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

wealth in being a high-achiever is undeniable.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, in terms of

personnal

Correct your spelling

personal

personnel

fullfilment

Correct your spelling

fulfilment

, job satisfaction is the

first

Linking Words

and foremost in the career path which is not achievable other than being

entusiathic

Correct your spelling

enthusiastic

enough in the study plan which is rooted in the related profession. The more interested, the more successful might be the volunteers in their jobs , regardless of the skills;including

scientist

Fix the agreement mistake

scientists

show examples

, teachers , managers , lawyers. Professor Samei could be an ideal instance; as he is one of the greatest contemporary

celebral

Correct your spelling

cerebral

specialists globally. He had chosen to be a doctor when he was a child and imagined himself as a prolific one, so is he.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is clear that working up the ladder in the

carrer

Correct your spelling

career

path will be more probable in the pursuit of emotional closeness to the background education. in

conlusion

Correct your spelling

conclusion

, I reaffirm my position on partially agreeing and disagreeing with the belief of

chosing

Correct your spelling

choosing

a highly profitable major of study, because

although

Linking Words

it might open an array of

oppurnities

Correct your spelling

opportunities

, it should be wisely decided aligned with personal

fulfillments

Correct your spelling

fulfilment

show examples

Submitted by haniyehfargh on Sat Dec 18 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

359 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people say that there is too much harmful content on the internet. They say the only way to make the internet safe is for the government to censor the content of websites. To what extent do you think the government should control what information is available on the internet?
There is no denying that the internet greatly impacts today's life. However, many people believe that information on cyber platforms is dangerous for society, so the government should take some steps to censor detrimental information. Hence, I believe that censorship is not the solution to this problem. Authorities can take some steps rather than banning all the information online.
6.5
band
In the future, the main reason for going to the shopping mall will be for entertainment, not to shop. Do you agree or disagree?
It is predicted that in the coming years, the purpose that residents visit shopping malls is for relaxation instead of going shopping. This essay will present detailed reasons why I'm afraid I have to disagree with this opinion.
7.5
band
More and more people are buying fashionable clothes these days. Does it have more negative or positive effects? Give reasons for your answers and include examples relevant to your experience.
Nowadays, we can see a significant trend in the majority of individuals purchasing state-of-the-art clothes. While extending a variety of outfits represents people's wealth and their interest in fashion, there are some alternative destinations to spend private revenues like charity foundations or other community-related projects.
6.5
band
Nowadays, a lot of people are able to do their work from home. Discuss both the advantage and disadvantages of this development.
These days, many people are now working from home. Some of its disadvantages are that there are many distractions at home and it can lead to social isolation, however, the advantages it brings such as the ability to save more money and more flexibility are more beneficial to individuals.
7.5
band
With an increasing population communicating via the internet messaging , face to face communication is the thing of the past. To what extent you agree or disagree.
With a growing number of citizens conversating via online messaging, eye-to-eye conversation will be an item of history. I am in complete concord with this conception. Many people's lives are related to their mobile phones and their children are taking cases from their parents and playing gadgets regularly . They spend their time on the phone by playing online games with their friends, watching illegal videos and watching horror films. However, there are some households which have a positive interaction with each other to use their smartphones wisely by learning foreign languages and subjects in online lessons. Especially, on a daily basis, they talk to each other by messaging and calling. Even some emotional attitudes are made by communicators.For example, the BBC LEARNING English announced that most traits are created by youngsters online ca...

students should choose a university major that prepares them for a hig-paying job. To what extent do you agree with this satement?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people say that there is too much harmful content on the internet. They say the only way to make the internet safe is for the government to censor the content of websites. To what extent do you think the government should control what information is available on the internet?

In the future, the main reason for going to the shopping mall will be for entertainment, not to shop. Do you agree or disagree?

More and more people are buying fashionable clothes these days. Does it have more negative or positive effects? Give reasons for your answers and include examples relevant to your experience.

Nowadays, a lot of people are able to do their work from home. Discuss both the advantage and disadvantages of this development.

With an increasing population communicating via the internet messaging , face to face communication is the thing of the past. To what extent you agree or disagree.