IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Discipline is an ever increasing problem in moden schools. Some people think that discipline should be the responsibility of teachers, while others thỉnk that this is the role of parents. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#discipline #moden #schools #people #responsibility #teachers #thỉnk #role #parents
There is irrefutable evidence that
discipline
 is a big issue in modern schools;
nevertheless
, opinions are mixed regarding it. Whilst some are of the opinion that instructors should be responsible
of
Change the preposition
for
show examples
discipline
 in
school
. Others claim that
parents
 are the
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
 who should take
this
 mission. In my perspective, I am in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
with
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the former view. There are a few reasons why
discipline
 is the role of teachers. One explanation why some support
this
 point of view is that students often spend most of their time in
school
 ,and if teachers put their roles in the class , that may influence students'
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 positively .
In other words
 , pupils will get used to
discipline
 as a habit because they follow the instruction every day.
For instance
, In most countries around the world, most kids in
school
 do morning assembly every day. Many people
also
 assume that most students get their teachers as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
role
model
Fix the agreement mistake
models
show examples
. A plethora of young people behave like their instructors when they like them and believe
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their thoughts.
Nonetheless
, there are some who feel that
parents
 are responsible
of
Change the preposition
for
show examples
discipline
. One explanation why some support
this
 point of view is that kids get their essential habits from their fathers, mothers, or both. When
child
Add an article
a child
the child
show examples
 in his/
her
Change the word
an
show examples
 early age , they stay most of their time with their
parents
 , and they mime them and learn
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 them. Another convincing explanation is that roles
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
established at home, they
are really matter
Change the verb form
really matter
show examples
.If
father
Correct article usage
a father
show examples
 or mother put clear instructions for their kids, it may help them in real life.
For example
,
parents
 can train their children to clean their rooms after they wake up
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the ground of feel responsible. By way of conclusion, There has a mixed reaction about
this
 subject. My own considered opinion is that
school
 has
important
Add an article
an important
show examples
 role in
discipline
mor
Correct your spelling
more
 than home.
Submitted by fwzeah on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: