some people think secondary school students should learn international news as one of their subjects, while others believe that this is a waste of valuable time. Discuss both views ang give your opinion

#people #school #students #news #subjects #waste #time #ang

globalization is an inevitable trend today. people recommend that teens should have

time

for what is going on in the world, but

somes

Correct your spelling

some

said there is no

time

for

unneccessary

Correct your spelling

unnecessary

subject

Fix the agreement mistake

subjects

show examples

. in my point of

view

Add a comma

,view

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

support

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

first

one. in terms of the main aspect, studying many subjects

such

as math, chemistry,

physical

Replace the word

physics

show examples

,... is very stressful. so they

wont

Add an apostrophe

won't

show examples

have

time

for another subject which can

also

make them

distract

Wrong verb form

distracted

show examples

Change preposition

from

show examples

learning in school. leads o less

time

to rest and support their family. in another aspect, learning international things will help students understand more about global society.

then

they can easily receptivity, recognize and be more alert about information. if students know the importance of knowledge for the future of the world, they will be more motivated to study.

such

a statue, children in middle school often have

dream

Fix the agreement mistake

dreams

show examples

for their future so that they can be

attacted

Correct your spelling

attached

attracted

to news more than classic subjects. when they have

passion

Add an article

a passion

the passion

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

something, they are willing to spend their

time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

studying. in conclusion,

internatinal

Correct your spelling

international

news is an

in dispensable

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indispensable

show examples

element in the learning process of students. they should be taught from now to have a better awareness.

Submitted by msphuong1234 on Wed Dec 22 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

199 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some people think secondary school students should learn international news as one of their subjects, while others believe that this is a waste of valuable time. Discuss both views ang give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Topic. In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and homes in specific areas and separate them from each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages ?

In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages ?

Some people believe that it is good to share as much as information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to shared freely.

Some believe that modern technology is increasing the gap between rich and poor people, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.