The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth of overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

Most
Add an article
The most
show examples
crowd
Change to a plural noun
crowds
show examples
are getting serious well-being issues because of increasing statistics of
people
becoming obese.
This
essay will mention
as
Correct word choice
that
show examples
the main reason is
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not having enough
time
to cook as
people
have
time
before,so
people
eat fast
food
more often.
This
could be solved by adding extra
tax
to the fast-
foodfood
Correct your spelling
food food
good food
restaurants. Nowadays, society
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
very busy that some of them have two full-
timetime
Correct your spelling
time time
time-time
jobs and have
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
time
to cook at home which is easier to think of fast
food
as the
first
choice. Fast
food
restaurants are often seen on every corner in the
United
Correct your spelling
united
show examples
states
Change the capitalization
States
show examples
and they have really affordable prices that
people
are harder to deny to consume. it is easier to get your
food
by getting to the
drive through
Add a hyphen
drive-through
show examples
and you will have within 10 minutes warm and tasty
food
at very cheap prices.
For example
: 90 per cent of American
people
love to eat Carlos junior Hamburgers because are fast, tasty and cheap, so
people
do not have to invest
time
to cook at home. It is really easy to choose fast
food
because the flavour, price and the portions are presented as extra sizes for the same inexpensive price. I disagree with
this
type of fast
food
because
this
is unhealthy
food
that will harm
people
's
health
in a very short
time
.
These poor choice
Change the determiner
This poor choice
These poor choices
show examples
of consuming fast
food
could be solved by adding an extra
tax
on every fast
food
restaurant so
people
will have to think twice every
time
they want to consume fast
food
. It is not acceptable that citizens chose fast
food
as the main source of
food
because they will become obese and might present
health
issues
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
might end up on chronic diseases. These sick
people
will depend on the
health
system and the government will end up paying for their recovery by using citizens' money.
For instance
, Int the United states is common to see obese
people
suffering from hypertension due to poor
food
choices in the past, so
health
programs
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
to treat these
peoplepeople
Correct your spelling
people people
for the rest of their lives.
This
essay totally agrees to add extra
tax
on fast
food
to avoid obese statistic going up every year, so
people
will be aware of
this
health
issue. To conclude, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
are tend to become every year more overweight due to consuming unhealthy
food
such
as fast
food
and
this
issue might be solved by adding an extra
tax
on all unhealthy grassy
food
, so citizens might become more aware of
this
health
issue.
Submitted by cuevas14dic on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • sedentary
  • caloric intake
  • genetics
  • nutritional awareness
  • processed foods
  • fast food
  • lifestyle diseases
  • preventative measures
  • tax incentives
  • urban planning
  • community gardens
  • wellness initiatives
  • dietary guidelines
  • physical fitness
  • calorie-dense
  • portion control
  • metabolic rate
  • health literacy
  • food deserts
  • work-life balance
  • junk food
  • BMI (Body Mass Index)
  • non-communicable diseases
  • food labeling
What to do next:
Look at other essays: