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Band 5

Establishing good relationships in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#relationships #workplace #person #focus #work
Mutual-understanding
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Mutual understanding
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 among the employees
play
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plays
show examples
 a crucial role in any organisation.
However
, it is
considerded
Correct your spelling
considered
 by some people that on
work
 our
first
prority
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priority
 will be to complete our task with dedication rather than to make personal relationships with the employees at
work
. I partially agree with
this
 statement which
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 would like to discuss in upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, making
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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good friends at
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
show examples
 are essential because they help us to finish our
work
 not only quickly but
also
 qualitatively .
For instance
, if we are going to
work
 in teams as a
teammembers
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team members
than
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then
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 it will be easy for us to complete
plethora
Correct article usage
a plethora
show examples
 of tasks
in
Change preposition
within
show examples
specific
Correct article usage
a specific
show examples
 time limit.
Otherwise
, if we can
work
 separately
than
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then
show examples
 it would take more time and we will be less productive. On the other side, if people would waste
their
Change the pronoun
them
show examples
all time
Add a hyphen
all-time
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to make
Change the verb form
making
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 friends at
work
then
 how will they focus on their
work
.
Instead
 of keeping their mind on tasks, they always become busy
to plan
Change the verb form
planning
show examples
 the outside meetings after
work
.
Thus
,
this
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 may affect the quality as well as productivity of the organisation which may
Correct your spelling
affect
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effect
Correct your spelling
affect
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 the reputation of the company.
Hence
, it is recommended our
first
 goal should be to focus on
work
instead
 of making bosom friends. In a nutshell, to
work
 in a team, it is mandatory to have a mutual understanding between the team members but sometimes their personal relationships might put
hazardous
Add an article
a hazardous
the hazardous
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 effect on the production of
organisation
Add an article
an organisation
the organisation
show examples
.
Thus
, it is recommended, the relationships between employees are
neccesary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 but to certain limits because their main destination is to complete their tasks.
Submitted by harman1992narain on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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