Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

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Some
people
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say that the best way to improve public
health
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is by increasing the number of
sports
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facilities
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. Others
however
Linking Words
say that
this
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would have little effect on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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public
health
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and that other measures are required. There
are
Change the verb form
is
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number
Change the article
a number
the number
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of ways to improve public
health
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, one measure can be to improve and increase
sports
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facilities
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in the area. I believe that public
health
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can be improved to a certain level by increasing
sports
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facilities
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like opening swimming pool, cricket, tennis, football grounds in an area. The opening of
such
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sports
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clubs or grounds will not only provide new and improved
sports
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facilities
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to
sports
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enthusiasts but
also
Linking Words
to the public who wants to learn
a new sport
Correct the article-noun agreement
new sport sports
a new sport sport
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sports
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. The general public will definitely be benefited from improved
sports
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facilities
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but
this
Linking Words
measure is not the only way. One should focus on other measures which can promote healthy living. There are other initiatives
such
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as opening a park, construction of running tracks, gyms,
yoga
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places etc. The
community
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must contribute and collaborate with the
people
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of different societies to work on
such
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initiatives to promote a healthy lifestyle. For an instance, the opening of a park to the public will encourage
people
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of all age groups to visit and engage in different activities like running, performing
yoga
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etc. that in turn improve the
health
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of the
people
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. Organizing different
yoga
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sessions benefit
people
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in a variety of different ways. Performing
yoga
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every day improves flexibility, reduces stress and keeps the body and mind calm. Apart from
this
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,
people
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should
also
Linking Words
focus on healthy eating habits. A number of
community
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health
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promotion programs, which enable
people
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to follow a healthy lifestyle. These programs offer an opportunity to empower the
community
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to enable all citizens to have access to
health
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care
facilities
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. Enhancing the quality of healthcare centres in the region can contribute immensely to
promote
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promoting
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the
health
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of the public. To conclude, I feel that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
health
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can be improved by combined initiatives of improving
sports
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facilities
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as well as
as
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
promoting
community
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health
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promotion programs.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
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