IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Write about the following topic. Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#topic #people #advertisements #products #lives
These days, branding plays a vital role for both manufacturers and the general public as it creates awareness of a new
product
 in the market. It is believed that many
people
 got fascinated by the promotional activities ,
consequently
Add a comma
,consequently
show examples
 they end up buying the same which is not necessary.
However
,
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
 inform folks about the latest
product
 which proves to be beneficial for
people
.
First
 and foremost ,because of advertising,
people
 come to know about the additional features of the existing
product
 which are actually required by many.
To
Change preposition
For
show examples
 instance, when
automobile
Correct article usage
the automobile
show examples
 industry launched compressed natural gas
variant
Fix the agreement mistake
variants
show examples
 in different cars , it was promoted through advertisements and proved to be helpful for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society as it controlled pollution caused by petroleum cars.
Secondly
,
pollution
Correct article usage
the pollution
show examples
 rate is rising at a very fast pace due to which air quality is getting worst leading to the high demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 air purifiers. Some companies
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 taken initiatives to
lauch
Correct your spelling
launch
such
 kind of
product
 which will reach to
people
 only through media and
helped
Wrong verb form
help
show examples
 many
people
 to save their lives. To conclude,
Pros
Correct article usage
the Pros
show examples
 and cons
lies
Change the verb form
lie
show examples
 with everything .
Therefore
, we need to put emphasis on the positive side which states the awareness of the
product
 is necessary and only possible with
such
 type of methods only and reach
the
Change the article
a
show examples
 large number of buyers in
single
Add an article
a single
show examples
 go.
Submitted by harpreet19071994 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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