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Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, people spend long hours at work. Why does this happen? Is it positive or negative development?

#countries #people #hours #work #happen #development
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It is a popular trend that more and more
employees
Use synonyms
 take longer to
work
Use synonyms
 in some parts of the world. Many people have questioned the motives behind these issues, which exerts several impacts on staff.
First
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 of all, the root of working overtime is the pressure of
work
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 or
employees
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' deep desire for their job. For the former, accompanied by t
he e
Correct article usage
apply
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conomic development, the workload increases. It requires staff h
andle
Fix the infinitive
to handle
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more tasks within s
horter
Add an article
a shorter
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time
Use synonyms
.
As a result
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, if they a
re not finish
Change the verb form
do not finish
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their
work
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 on
time
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, they will have no choice excepted s
tay
Fix the infinitive
to stay
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t
he
Change preposition
in the
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office. For the latter, the motive for devoting personal
time
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 to
work
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 is g
reat
Add an article
a great
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passion for
work
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. In fact, researchers spend almost all
t
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ime
Correct pronoun usage
their time
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day by day researching and experimenting. Not only do they make money, but
also
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 get the feeling of satisfaction, success, and fame.
As a result
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,
this
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 trend leads to health problems, reduction of
work
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 efficiency when
work
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time
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 occupies too much. To be more specific, the more
time
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 to
work
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, the little
time
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 to take care of themselves.
Consequently
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,
employees
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 may face both mental and physical ailments like stress, pain back in the short term, or cancer in the long term.
For example
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, s
edentary
Correct article usage
a sedentary
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lifestyle, which contributes to poor health quality and obesity, become popular in o
fficer
Correct article usage
the officer
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g
roup.
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
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Besides
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,
although
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 the length of
work
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time
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 is longer than average, the efficiency is less because people’s attention span is limited. In short, spending too much
time
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 working has harmful effects on people. In conclusion, due to the requirement of jobs or the
employees
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’ desire, overtime working i
s happen.
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
However
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,
employees
Use synonyms
 should not let themselves in
this
Linking Words
 situation because of the harm.
Submitted by nhudinhngocanh on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • prevalent
  • economic pressures
  • financial stability
  • competitive job markets
  • corporate cultures
  • stigma
  • demonstrate dedication
  • advent of technology
  • blurred the lines
  • accelerated career progression
  • dedicated employee
  • significant negative implications
  • stress levels
  • mental health
  • physical health
  • social and family time
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • flexible working hours
  • work-life balance
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