The use of violence in music lyrics, video games and films seen by children is causing concern in many societies. What problems may be caused by this type of violent imagery, and what steps could be taken to lessen the impact on young people?
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In
the development of Change preposition
With
the
smart technology, Correct article usage
apply
an
availability of video games, movies, Correct article usage
the
songs
, which contain roughness, among children is out of parental control. Correct word choice
and songs
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can ultimately take a serious toll on individuals and community
in various ways. In Fix the agreement mistake
communities
this
essay, we will discuss three crises and the number of solutions also
appears to be possible Perhaps the worst problem stemming from this
is the maturity change. If one’s surrounding
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surroundings
keeps
issues ranging from murderCorrect subject-verb agreement
keep
,
to fighting, and violence; they Remove the comma
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are eventually believe
that Change the verb form
eventually believe
such
behavior is normal, or desirable. This
situation leads a
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to a
further
crisis, which is an imitation. Youngers are more likely to mimic what they see; especially in this
case, they will behave improperly with their pets or friends, etc. Finally
, we must consider the issue of mental health. Psychiatrists emphasize that the cognition of the developing brain is easily impaired by strong external stimulators, which demonstrated
by anxiety or aggressiveness. To curb these dangers, one key step would be to legislate more firmly to control the content as mentioned above; Add a missing verb
are demonstrated
for instance
, they could be censored by age-limit
. Correct your spelling
age limit
This
would prevent unsuitable material influencing
young minds. Another remedy may be to encourage Change preposition
from influencing
child’s
interest by attending training Correct article usage
a child’s
such
as music, ballet, taekwondo and
painting, etc., or parents spend more time with their family. All of these activities dilute psychiatric issues. In conclusion, the main problems from inappropriate content are all related Correct word choice
apply
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to
with
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to
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a child’s
child’s
mental health; Correct article usage
a child’s
however
the solution will be reversed by combined
action of caregivers and authorities.Add an article
the combined
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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion