Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this is a bad example to adolescents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #adolescents

It is argued that most

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apply

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the

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apply

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celebrities

are known for their luxurious lifestyle than for

perfomance

Correct your spelling

performance

or talents these days. Some people feel that it is a bad example for the young generation. In my opinion, I completely agree with ideas it useful impacts on youngsters. Today, there are several famous

celebrities

and actors who are extremely popular

because

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ofbecause

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their extravagant lifestyle,

instead

of their developing skills of performances. Their acting talent might be standard or below the average, but they are making

sensation

Correct article usage

a sensation

show examples

to the public by showing their wealth and glamorous lifestyle.

On the other hand

, there are some

celebrities

who can be

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apply

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positive role

model

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models

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for young adults. They have reached success due to strong determination and hard work, and the public

recognise

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recognises

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them for their masterpiece of arts and great achievements. Actors, musicians and

sport

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sports

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stars become famous idols because they worked hard and applied themselves to develop real skills and abilities. They

shows

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show

show examples

great effort, determination and ambition, which is required for someone who wants successful in the future. In conclusion, I think that famous

celebrities

have a positive impact on everyone, especially

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation.

However

, parents need to have the right education orientation fỏ their children.

Submitted by domaianh.uliser on Sat Jan 15 2022

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

204 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this is a bad example to adolescents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

As parents, they should be required to attend parenting courses every year to bring up their children well and give them a better environment for growth. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The best way / the only way to reduce poverty(INDIVIDUALS / GOVERNMENT) in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. do you agree or disagree?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country.