Some people think that managerial posts in private companies and in government are more suitable for men. Others think that given the opportunity women can be successful managers.
Nowadays, many
manager
in private companies and in government is male. So some people think If Change to a plural noun
managers
women
have Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
opportunity
, they Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
also
will be a successful managers
. I Correct the article-noun agreement
a successful manager
successful managers
also
believe women
can be successful managers. Many high managerial posts are male,
because people always think Remove the comma
apply
men
are reliable. And they agreed that men
should work and make money to take care of their families. Therefore
, because of this
tradition, women
are also
considered not to need too much salary or promotion opportunity
. Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
As a result
, most women
have no chance of get
high managerial posts. I can understand that people think Change the verb form
getting
men
are more suitable for these jobs because they are more independent, strong and look like
Change preposition
apply
saliable
. But I think Correct your spelling
saleable
liable
salable
women
are actually more careful and can carefu
;Correct your spelling
careful
;
y many small details. The most important thing is that Change the punctuation
apply
women
have more affinity, can care about workers and exchange work experience. And now society more care about equality, so women
should have provided
with the same job opportunity as Add a missing verb
been provided
men
. Governments and companies should both do it. Positions should be arranged according to personal ability, not gender.Submitted by myang on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite