IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise cannot be returned. Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter Describe the problem with the jacket. Explain what happened when you tried to return it. Say what you would like the manager to do.

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Dear Sir, Hope you are well. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my sadness about
previous
Change the article
the previous
show examples
 shop from your
store
Use synonyms
. I had bought a
jacket
Use synonyms
, but when I came
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
home
Add an article
the home
show examples
, I have realized it was damaged very
bad
Replace the word
badly
show examples
. It was impossible to wear. When I was in
Use synonyms
store
Correct article usage
the store
show examples
, I haven'
t
Use synonyms
 controlled the
jacket
Use synonyms
 totally.
However
Linking Words
, I tried to wear
at
Correct pronoun usage
it at
show examples
 home, I couldn'
t
Use synonyms
 wear it because of
zipper
Add an article
the zipper
show examples
 is not working. It was broken.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
 there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 some white
blemish
Fix the agreement mistake
blemishes
show examples
 on the arms of the
jacket
Use synonyms
. After I discovered these problems, I went to your
store
Use synonyms
last
Linking Words
 Tuesday. I have talked with your
store
Use synonyms
 associate. She told me, because of discounts, we can'
t
Use synonyms
 return any of
products
Correct article usage
the products
show examples
. Though, I couldn'
t
Use synonyms
 return my damaged product. As a being consumer, I request you to change my damaged
jacket
Use synonyms
 with
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
 one. I like your
store
Use synonyms
 and I do shop quite often from your
store
Use synonyms
. Nobody can wear
this
Linking Words
jacket
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
current
Correct pronoun usage
its current
show examples
 condition. I would be very glad if you change my product. Sincerely, Ezgi Koçak

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