IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The pie charts below show the percentage of electricity production by fuel source in France in 1990 and 2010.

The pie charts below show the percentage of electricity production by fuel source in France in 1990 and 2010.
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The two pie charts show the proportion of
electricity
Use synonyms
 production which was produced by five types of fuel in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
France during the period
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
 1990 and 2010
also
Linking Words
. In 1990 , the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of coal,
as well as
Linking Words
 natural gas which had been used for
electricity
Use synonyms
, with 28% and the
second
Linking Words
 higher
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of oil,
electricity
Use synonyms
, with 28% and the
second
Linking Words
 higher
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
oil
Add an article
the oil
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 had used for it at 22%.
An
Correct article usage
The
show examples
 average proportion of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 was 17% and the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hydro
Correct your spelling
hydropower
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power
Use synonyms
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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produced
electricity
Use synonyms
, with 6% . In the year 2010, the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 had been used to produce
electricity
Use synonyms
, with 67%. A similar per cent of coal
along with
Linking Words
 oil
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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13% , and the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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natural gas,
as well as
Linking Words
 hydro
power
Use synonyms
,
as well as
Linking Words
Correct your spelling
hydropower power
hydropowerpower
Add the comma(s)
,hydropowerpower
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had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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produced
electricity
Use synonyms
, with 4% and 2% , respectively.
Overall
Linking Words
, the higher proportion of natural gas and coal
also
Linking Words
 but in the
second
Linking Words
 period of time, the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 in the production of
electricity
Use synonyms
 rather than other sources of energy in both years.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "as well as, also, second".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, percentage, power with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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