IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

people follow intrests and have hobbies.Do you think it is pointless? How can people learn from hobbies

#people #intrests #hobbies
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The way in which how
people
Use synonyms
 consider their hobbies and what extend learning from hobbies in contemporary society has become a topic of discussion among researchers.
However
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 are spending their leisure
time
Use synonyms
 on hobbies.In the past, a substantial number of humans did collecting and
memorised
Wrong verb form
memorising
show examples
 facts but
people
Use synonyms
 of the modern era are spending their leisure
time
Use synonyms
 entertaining with electronic devices,making youtube videos and travelling.
Therefore
Linking Words
,I am inclined to believe that the younger population should get involved not only in academic work but
also
Linking Words
 in their
hobby
Use synonyms
, which might help them to expand their horizons of success
To begin
Linking Words
 with,It is critical to realize the fact that allocating
time
Use synonyms
 for a
hobby
Use synonyms
 plays a vital role in mental and physical health development.In my experience. as a
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
hobby
Use synonyms
 I do hiking .I have lots of memorizing facts on peeks of mountains,and
also
Linking Words
 it is better for my mental and physical health.As well as,I started a shop for the sale of travelling and camera equipment.I learned and ,I got lots of experience from my
hobby
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,each person carries a hidden potential
that is
Linking Words
 unique to him or her. So in their
hobby
Use synonyms
 providing them with opportunity from them to learn their own capacity and their uniqueness.
for example
Linking Words
,the person who can play musical instruments or sing songs as a
hobby
Use synonyms
,It is his innate ability.Their
hobby
Use synonyms
 carries a significant value in climbing up the career ladder In conclusion,It is proven to be in the view that leisure
time
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 should be utilized in a productive way through which they can gain knowledge as well as life skills which may assist them in making a giant stride forward in their journey in search of green pastures of prosperity
Submitted by krishanthennakoon567 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: