IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

A big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

#salary #job #satisfaction
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is often argued that earning large amounts of money plays a more crucial role in
people
Use synonyms
’s lives compared with the fulfillments in their workplaces.
This
Linking Words
 essay totally disagrees with that statement. In my opinion, being content with their jobs will prevent deterioration of mental and physical
health
Use synonyms
, and pursuing their passions will lead to great career development.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the majority of
people
Use synonyms
 favour a joyful and pleasant work-life over high paying but stressful one because the negative working environment leads to depression, dissatisfaction and mental problems;
moreover
Linking Words
, being employed in a big salary but
tiring
Add an article
the tiring
show examples
 job will bring about many diseases: cardiovascular, musculoskeletal and neurological diseases to count but a few. To give a clear example, my uncle, a CEO of a huge company, has suffered work burnout, which leads to insomnia, hypertension and anxiety disorder despite making huge profits.
Thus
Linking Words
, most
people
Use synonyms
 prefer being contented and joyous with their professions.
In addition
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
 follow their passions and personal goals, they will achieve remarkable outcomes. Having a sense of satisfaction from the jobs motivates
people
Use synonyms
, encouraging them to perform more efficiently and to accomplish life-long dreams.
For instance
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 many doctors are constantly under much pressure and workloads, those who enjoy their professions achieve multiple goals in their career pathway, while those who have no passion in the medical fields suffer from mental
health
Use synonyms
 problems and fail to improve their lives. In conclusion, I strongly believe that neglecting one’s happiness and
health
Use synonyms
 is not worth prioritising over a large income as the feeling of contentment and happiness will bless
people
Use synonyms
 with great
health
Use synonyms
 and certainty in climbing their career ladders in the future.
Submitted by ttz27 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • remuneration
  • financial security
  • motivation
  • luxuries
  • material possessions
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • stress levels
  • mental well-being
  • job security
What to do next:
Look at other essays: