Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which why children are less well educated today. To what extend do you agree with this statement.

It is true that
teenagers
are becoming
spent
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
more time in front of
digital
Add an article
the digital
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entertainment industry.
However
,
books
are not a tool that
TV
can
comparison
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compare
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with. In my opinion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
partly agree with
this
statement because children can be benefitted from
TV
education programmes. On the one hand, young people use textbooks example doing homework and
leaning
Correct your spelling
learning
show examples
new
topic
Fix the agreement mistake
topics
show examples
, and took a huge number of knowledge from it ,and
also
after they read many
books
,
chiln
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child
children
read
books
quickly, sometimes if
teenagers
recite some contents of
classic
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the classic
a classic
show examples
novel,they could write those on their essay,so
kids
will get a lot of reading or writing skill and knowledge from
books
,which is much better than
TV
which is
digital
Add an article
the digital
a digital
show examples
entertainment industry,
kids
use it to watching
TV
series, variety shows,talk shows e.g. for
couple
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a couple
show examples
of hours
everyday
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every day
show examples
.
On the other hand
,
although
television does relax the
kids
, television still
have
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has
show examples
a lot of
education
Replace the word
educational
show examples
film and programmes, if
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
bureau
creat
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create
show examples
more educational children’s films or channel ,
then
teenagers
could leaning study, study, cooking skills.watch educational
channnel
Correct your spelling
channel
channels
will lead
kids
learn
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to learn
show examples
more life skills that
books
can not tell younger.
For example
,a channel
tell
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tells
show examples
if a kid living
in
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on
show examples
underground
Add an article
the underground
show examples
floor and did not bring the key with him,
then
he can climb through the window, to back home,
this
too for
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
personal approach to life. In conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
think
books
could help children get knowledge , but television is not only
relaxing
Correct article usage
a relaxing
show examples
electronic product
,
Add the word(s)
but,
show examples
it
also
can let
teenagers
know how to
solving
Wrong verb form
solve
show examples
realistic
Replace the word
real
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issues in their life.
Submitted by myang on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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