Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

Nowadays,

music

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the music

show examples

industry has become very popular among

the

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apply

show examples

youngster's

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youngsters

youngster

show examples

Although

,the fact that many civilians believe that

music

is a way to bring various religious

people

together and exchange emotions.

However

,I partially agree with the notion.The reasons for my agreement are explained in the following paragraphs. To embark with,there

are

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numerous

kind

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kinds

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music

which are

realeased

Correct your spelling

released

everyday

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every day

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and

people

are fond of cultural

music

especially the old aged

people

First

and foremost,

its

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it's

it is

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a very unique way of bringing

people

together.

For instance

,youngsters prefer to

listen

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tolisten

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all

type

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types

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music

whether it is in

hind

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Hindi

show examples

or in

english

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English

show examples

.Eventually,individuals can get plenty of information about other cultures as well as it will boost the knowledge of the person.

Furthermore

music

has

wide

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a wide

show examples

range of variety

hence

,no matter its a child or an adult so,

music

doesn't have any age differences.

As a result

,50% of the

music

is being heard by children and adults.On top of

that

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,that

show examples

the

music

events

also

bring

number

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a number

the number

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of amount

people

together.

On the contrary

,others claim the opposite and disagree with the statement.

Firstly

music

has become very popular day by day.

However

producer's create

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producer creates

show examples

music

the

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particular topic

therefore

,some civilians might not be happy and create hate and violence towards the

music

on the social media platform it may

also

lead to a big issue.

Secondly

music

is not a proper way of gathering public because

its

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always depends on a person's choice.All the

individual

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individuals

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have rights and have

weird

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the weird

a weird

show examples

mindset

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mindsets

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Last

but not least,in the

music

age matters so,according to one research children love to

listen

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tolisten

show examples

funny

music

compared to that adult more

prefering

Correct your spelling

preferring

romantic

music

. To conclude,

This

essay has been explored from both

the

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apply

show examples

side with enough evidence which

finally

allows me to pen down and state that

music

is useful to bring

people

of different

relegion

Correct your spelling

religion

religions

to some extent but sometimes

its

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show examples

not work because of

independent

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the independent

show examples

choice of the society.

Submitted by rohitgohel2658 on Thu Feb 10 2022

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

304 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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