Do you agree that supermarkets are a threat to small shops and local communities?

Some people think that modern supermarkets are impacting
to
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apply
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local
communities
and small
shops
. In my opinion, though I accept that supermarkets are more convenient, l believe that there is still
need
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a need
show examples
for local
communities
and corner
shops
. It is true that nowadays more and more citizens tend to
shopping
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shop
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in the big shopping plaza.
Firstly
, big outlets have many
type
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types
show examples
of products. Almost all of
big
Add an article
the big
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outlets sort and classify by clothes, foods… from budget brands to premium brands so it’s easy
for looking
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to look
show examples
for by customers.
Secondly
, big supermarkets have various
promotion
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promotions
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.
For instance
, in
Australia
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Australia,
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a lot of items will half
price
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priced
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on
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apply
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every Wednesday to
attracted
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attract
show examples
citizens. Both reasons
that is
the reason why people go to small
shops
less.
On the other hand
, local
communities
and small
shops
sell special items. Fresh.
For example
, local markets sell homemade clean vegetables, safe for health.
Besides
, local
communities
and small grocery stores
near
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are near
show examples
to
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apply
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people’
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people’s
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living
area
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areas
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,
thus
everyone
convenient
Add a missing verb
is convenient
show examples
to move. When families lack some small
stuffs
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stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
, citizens can go to small stores faster. But huge stores could
sold
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sell
be sold
show examples
problems relating
jobs
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to jobs
show examples
and consciousness make a plan of people. Every time go shopping, everyone will write down
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
show examples
stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
without being missed.
Submitted by nhudinhngocanh on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure a more logical structure to your essay, and provide a better balance between introduction, main body, and conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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