Some people believe that the fast pace and stress of modern life is having a negative effect on families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, living in
urban
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the urban
an urban

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city makes
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the connection
a connection

The noun phrase connection seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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connection
Fix the agreement mistake
connections

It seems that connection may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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in
family
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the family

The noun phrase family seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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getting worse caused by
depressed
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depression

The word depressed doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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and high-speed of modern life. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words

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opinion because
community
Correct article usage
the community

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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less spend their time with family and they
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

did not want to share their problem
to
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with

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their closest family.
First
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of all, contemporary lifestyle
demand
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demands

The plural verb demand does not appear to agree with the singular subject contemporary lifestyle. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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people to the fast pace for their activity and cause negative things in the house. They usually spend most of their time
for
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on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities

It seems that activity may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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outside
Add a hyphen
home-like

It appears that home like is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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home
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the home

The noun phrase home seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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like working and studying. That activity caused them got less contact with their family.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
community
Correct article usage
the community

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spend about 8 to 10 hour
to work
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working

To work doesn’t seem to work here.

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and takes around 2
hour
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hours

The singular noun hour follows a number other than one. Consider changing the noun to the plural form.

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in
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on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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Correct your spelling
the
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they
Correct your spelling
the

The word they doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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way to the office.
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
high-speed
Correct article usage
a high-speed

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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lifestyle
lead
Change the verb form
leads

The plural verb lead does not appear to agree with the singular subject high-speed lifestyle. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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to
bad
Correct article usage
a bad

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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impact
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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family
Add an article
a family
the family

The noun phrase family seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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in
urban
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an urban
the urban

The noun phrase urban city seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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city.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, stress caused by work
preasure
Correct your spelling
pressure

If you don’t want preasure to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

have
Change the verb form
has

The plural verb have does not appear to agree with the singular subject stress. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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drawback
impact
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for
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on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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household
Add an article
the household
a household

The noun phrase household seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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. Nowadays, people keep their
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems

It seems that problem may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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away from their closest
relative
Fix the agreement mistake
relatives

It seems that relative may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. It will cause
connection
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the connection
a connection

The noun phrase connection seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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between them far away than before and bring negative
impact
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
For Instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, a father got fired in his works, he will keep secret his problem to their family and it could lead to
bad
Correct article usage
a bad

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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impact
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the families. That's why
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma after the subordinating conjunction why. Consider removing the comma.

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stress
Add an article
the stress

The noun phrase stress seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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in contemporary life could make
negative
Add an article
a negative

The noun phrase negative impact seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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impact
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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families. In conclusion, I completely agree with the
statment
Correct your spelling
statement

If you don’t want statment to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

that
current
Correct article usage
the current

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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lifestyle could bring
negative
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the negative
a negative

The noun phrase negative thing seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things

It seems that thing may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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to
family
Correct article usage
the family

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is because high-speed of living that makes people got far away from their family and stress that they got from
work life
Add a hyphen
work-life

It appears that work life is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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lead to community become more selfish than before.

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • modern life
  • fast pace
  • stress
  • negative effect
  • family bonds
  • working hours
  • conflicts
  • advancements in technology
  • distract
  • family time
  • financial pressures
  • living standards
  • strain
  • individuals
  • family activities
  • traditions
What to do next:
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