some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matter(such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their wishes. other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

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Some people claim that autonomy may lead to

egoist

Correct your spelling

egoism

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while

Linking Words

others argue that it is crucial for one’s growth. As far as I am concerned, children should

have

Verb problem

make

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their own decisions with guidance teaching the desirable

value

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values

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This

Linking Words

essay will examine both sides and elaborate on my view.

To begin

Linking Words

with, making their own decisions is necessary for kids to be responsible. Through making choices, youngsters will know that they need to bear the

consequence

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consequences

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of their own

decision

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decisions

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For example

Linking Words

, if a child prefers not to have lunch, the kid needs to suffer from hunger after. As it is inevitable to have undesirable outcomes, children are forced to be more conscious of their choices.

Consequently

Linking Words

instead

Linking Words

of being abounded with egoists, society should be filled with people who are more considerable for themselves

as well as

Linking Words

the community.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, it is

also

Linking Words

crucial for the parents to guide their offspring when they are learning to

pick

Verb problem

make

show examples

their own choices. Since the cognitive development of the younger generation is immature, children might need their parents to teach them what is favourable and what is not.

For instance

Linking Words

, if a kid always makes decisions irrespective of others’

wellbeing

Correct your spelling

well-being

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, they might become egocentric if their parents do not take any action to interrupt it.

Therefore

Linking Words

, these spoiled youngsters may become selfish in the future. In conclusion, young people should be provided with some free wishes under their parents’ guidance. Since family is not the only factor that affects one’s characteristics, kids may

also

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learn how to care about each other when they are in school before getting into society.

As a result

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, the concern that autonomy may lead to a selfish individual may not prevail in humanity.

hhhhelen.poonFri Feb 11 2022

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Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

285 words

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Your opinion

In some countries, many people do not have enough money to access the internet. Should governments be responsible for ensuring that everyone can get access to the internet?

The number of older people is increasing. Some people think that this will cause problems in their countries; others believe this group is important to society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

instead of requiring primary school students to do experiments themselves, schools should only alllow them to watch experiments demonstrated by teachers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?