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Writing Samples
Band 6

some parents believe that their children should do educational activities during their free time. Others say that in this way children are under pressure.

#parents #children #activities #time #pressure
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Educational
activities
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 play a crucial role for
children
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. In current society,
such
Linking Words
 educational
activities
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 are helpful to improve thoughts and skills. These educational
activities
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 include learning
programming
Change the verb form
to program
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, resolving mathematical problems and reading
literature
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literary
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 novels. Apparently, it is significant for
children
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 to do educational
activities
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 in their leisure time though the drawback is
children
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 may feel under
pressure
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.
Children
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 are likely to feel under
pressure
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 if they do not take a rest after school.
That is
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, the more educational
activities
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children
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 perform, the more likely they will be under
pressure
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. In
schools
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,
children
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 learn plenty of academic subjects involving chemistry, math, English and geography. After school, especially in Asia,
parents
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 usually ask their
children
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 to go to cram
schools
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 for much more knowledge of academic subjects. In that way,
children
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 usually feel exhausted and under
pressure
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 when they are in cram
schools
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. What’s worse, it may cause mental problems for those
children
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 if they disobey their
parents
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 to not go to cram
schools
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. In order to solve
such
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 a complicated issue,
firstly
Linking Words
,
parents
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 have to communicate with their
children
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 why they would not like to do educational
activities
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.
Secondly
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,
parents
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 can divide time into academics and recreation with their
children
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 so that
children
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 can not only concentrate on their education but
also
Linking Words
 relieve their academic
pressure
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. In that way,
children
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 can make a balance between academics and recreation. In conclusion, educational
activities
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 actually help
children
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 to strengthen their thoughts and skills in school.
However
Linking Words
, they may make
children
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 feel exhausted and impact their mentality.
Parents
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 need to find the reasons why their
children
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 do not want to adopt educational
activities
Use synonyms
 and establish academics and recreation time respectively if
children
Use synonyms
 are under
pressure
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by s25698363 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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