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Some people think that it is beneficial for children to do paid work, while others think that it can be harmful for children. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #children #work
Nowadays many companies
recruiting
Wrong verb form
recruit
show examples
 youngsters to work either part-time or full
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
. People
are argue
Change the verb form
are arguing
show examples
 on
this
 subject whether working from an early age might lead to decreasing the quality of
children
’s background
knowledge
 whereas many people think that earning money will help to be independent.
However
, the demerits found in
this
 topic would overshadow the merits. On the one hand, young people while working will probably get quite efficient
life
 experiences. Since they are in one project or field for a long time,
children
 will learn all aspects and even could be a good employer in future with
rich
Add an article
a rich
show examples
 bag of
knowledge
 in it.
Moreover
, it could
also
 help in managing and using money wisely, the results of which might be seen in their upcoming
life
.
Thus
, working for
children
 has many positive effects that can be useful not only in
life
 but
also
 in career too.
On the other hand
, starting working with fellow
knowledge
 could have a great negative impact on being a specialist of a particular job. As
children
 might focus only on the job or project they are probably will forget the educational parts and even ignore it.
Consequently
, without any based information youngsters start the career,
however
 after some decades they can be replaced with another employer with enriched educational skills.
Therefore
, the
first
 aspect that should be developed and paid much attention
in
Change preposition
to in
show examples
 their childhood is studying required
knowledge
. To conclude, even working for
children
 from adolescence has positive consequences, the fact that it could lead to many errors not only in their career but in their own
life
 too
is quite outweigh
Change the verb form
is quite outweighed
is quite outweighing
show examples
 the pros.
Submitted by azickww on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • beneficial
  • harmful
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • financial independence
  • responsibility
  • valuable skills
  • impact
  • education
  • exploitation
  • negative effects
  • social life
What to do next:
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