Some people think that public health is the responsibility of the government while others think that people should be responsible for their own health. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#people #health #responsibility #government

When the question regarding

health

is discussed there

are

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divided

opinion

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opinions

show examples

. A group of people regard that social well being

Correct your spelling

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the priority of authority; whereas a few others claim that society should be in control

for

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their personal

health

. Prior to my

opinion

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,opinion

show examples

both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

view would be discussed. Discussing the former opinion the supporter explain that

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,To

show examples

begin with administration should arrange social

health

clubs. With

this

people can aware about

excercises

Correct your spelling

exercises

exercise

and mental or physical

health

through which they will join

organization

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the organization

an organization

show examples

health

and can improve their overall fitness.

Moreover

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,Moreover

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they can appoint

central

Correct article usage

a central

show examples

health

officer

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officers

show examples

into

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a suburb

show examples

suburb

Fix the agreement mistake

suburbs

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that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will go door to door for checking

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apply

show examples

family strength and

collect

Wrong verb form

collecting

show examples

data. After that government should take some steps in order to improve public

health

. On the flip

side

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,side

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those who defend the latter view claim that.

Firstly

the person should eat

healthy

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a healthy

show examples

diet.

This

is to say that if the individual

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does

show examples

not control their eating habits of that it will

be resulted

Change to the active voice

result

have resulted

show examples

into

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serious illnesses and

other disease

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another disease

other diseases

show examples

such

as obesity Diabetes.

Secondly

Add a comma

,Secondly

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they might be check-up regular to f their

health

and take advice from experts as well as do as per suggestions of proficient doctor. Nowadays people are become aware

about

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their fitness and doing exercises and going to

gym

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the gym

show examples

. To sum up and offer my position I support

second

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the second

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view than the former one. It is their own body and they should take care of it by

consume

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consuming

show examples

healthy meals along with doing regular efforts

for

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show examples

upgrade their general physical

health

Submitted by ghorivinas64 on Mon Feb 14 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that public health is the responsibility of the government while others think that people should be responsible for their own health. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

These dats people are using the internet for shopping, work and to communicate with others without the need for face to face meetings. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some cultures think old people are of higher value than the youth, while other cultures value the youth more. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behavior. What is your opinion?

Some people think that work is the most important thing in people's lives. Without the success of a career, life will become meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?