In many parts of the world, people search for family history. some people think that finding for the previous generations is a thing to do,but others think that it is better to be focus on present and future generations.discuss both views and show your opinion.
In several areas worldwide, individuals are investigated to family past for obtaining information about their behaviour and rules.
However
, others assume that the community should focus only on modern and future youth. This
essay intends to analyse both perspectives. I personally believe that nation
should Correct article usage
the nation
give
Verb problem
apply
the
concentrate on upcoming clans because it assists Correct article usage
apply
to
Change preposition
in to
grow
Replace the word
growth
up
the nation and family as well.
Change preposition
of
To begin
with, if the population find the history of an ancient family, then
they will obtain a piece of knowledge about their habits, behaviour and rules which assists to make an excellent further
community because they know about moral values from grandparents. Moreover
, they do not only know about their culture and characters but also
look at the reputation in the society and they know about their
good deeds which were done in the past. Change the word
the
Hence
, all these things help to create a better society and youth
individuals.
Correct your spelling
young
On the other hand
, firstly
, the population can not become a
successful people in their life unless do not focus on their present family because it is essential to guide new modern Correct article usage
apply
household
for making a bright career with the support of near and dear Fix the agreement mistake
households
as well as
family members such
as how to follow the discipline, what is the aim in their own life and how to achieve this
rather than knowing about family past. Secondly
, the public could obtain name and fame in order to succeed in their goal. So, the national economy also
increases with the intelligent young tribe. As a result
, if the individuals make
a better future, Verb problem
have
then
they will take
extremely Verb problem
be
happiness
.
In Replace the word
happy
the
conclusion, Correct article usage
apply
although
family history taught us enormous moral values which is mandatory for increasing the value in society, obtaining happiness, goal and a good career just
only depend on focusing on the present and future folk.Rephrase
apply
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task response
The essay addresses both views, but the argumentation lacks clarity and focus. It is important to carefully analyze each perspective in detail.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. The cohesion between the paragraphs is weak, and the essay lacks a logical flow of ideas. Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas more effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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