IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

An annual event was recently held in your area. Now you want to write to the organizers of this event congratulating them on a successful production. Write a letter to the organizers. In your letter, give details of the event mention what you liked the most about the event make a polite criticism of something you thought could be improved

Dear Sir or Madam, As a member of the Frederick community in the city of Munich, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to congratulate you on a very successful production of the Folk
Music
Use synonyms
 Festival
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is held every year in our area. I am pretty sure that other members of our community would
also
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 feel the same way. Anyway,
this
Linking Words
 folk
music
Use synonyms
 festival takes place in our area every year, but
this
Linking Words
 probably is the first time in its history that you managed to attract so many people, not only from our own city but
also
Linking Words
 from many other parts of our country, with your
top class
Use the right word
top-class
show examples
 advertising works.
Besides
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, your flawless seating arrangement, top-class sound system, and choices of
music
Use synonyms
 just couldn’t be any better.
However
Linking Words
, what I really liked the most about the event was that you even allowed the audience to ask different kinds of questions to the present
music
Use synonyms
 artists bout their life and hobbies in a very friendly and casual environment. Of course, you could perhaps arrange even a bigger venue with a more spacious parking area, but, again, other than that, the whole event was simply superb. Many thanks once again. Yours faithfully, Mark Henry

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coherence
Keep one idea per paragraph. Start with a brief note about the event, then say what you liked and then what you would change.
structure
Make the start and end clear. Use a simple, formal tone with 'Dear' and 'Yours faithfully'.
tone
Use the same tone all through. Avoid casual words like 'Anyway' in a formal letter.
content
Be simple. Use short sentences. Say what you saw, what you liked, and what you think could be better.
content
The letter gives good detail about the event.
tone
The letter keeps a polite tone with the greeting and closing.
balance
It shows both good parts and a small point to improve.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • event
  • held
  • last
  • month
  • town
  • hall
  • market
  • show
  • acts
  • talks
  • visitors
  • staff
  • helpers
  • schedule
  • on time
  • clear
  • friendly
  • safe
  • good
  • variety
  • ages
  • signs
  • readable
  • seats
  • shade
  • queues
  • long
  • sound
  • food
  • drink
  • chairs
  • parking
  • thanks
  • thank
  • you
  • well
  • done
  • next
  • year
  • best
  • wishes
  • yours
  • sincerely
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