Nowadays more people have consumer goods like refrigerator and washing machines. Do you think this is a positive or negative development.

Clear goals
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
my future career have made me quite motivated,
ambicious
Correct your spelling
ambitious
and hardworking. I am always energetic and eager to become a competent manager and I feel ready for the hard work I am going to face. I am
decisive
Add an article
a decisive
show examples
strong-willed industrious person and I
absolutely
Add a missing verb
am absolutely
show examples
positive that Canada and Humber College is a perfect fit for me. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
I should say that in Russia the importance of business management is growing and becoming more valuable and demanded. Expert claim that
this
trend will
ne
Correct your spelling
be
insisting
Change the verb form
insist
be insisting
show examples
,
hence
the professions sales representatives, data analysts, client services managers, marketing and
busienss
Correct your spelling
business
managers expected to be in great demand in the coming years.
This
is due to the growing number of small and large enterprises which are
loooking
Correct your spelling
looking
for perspective and young specialists. The
enterpreneurial
Correct your spelling
entrepreneurial
industry in Russia has
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
plenty of perspectives, so I will be able to apply the knowledge and skills I will
recieve
Correct your spelling
receive
back here in my country. I will do my best to become
worthy
Add an article
a worthy
show examples
asset to the university and look
foward
Correct your spelling
forward
to
use
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
the gained experience in real work back here.
Submitted by narancycykotboeva on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • consumer goods
  • efficiency
  • health and hygiene
  • foodborne illnesses
  • environmental concerns
  • sustainability
  • economic growth
  • consumerism
  • cultural practices
  • communal
  • dependence on technology
What to do next:
Look at other essays: