IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The tables give information about the temperatures and hours of daylight in London and Sydney during the same weekend in December 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

The tables give information about the temperatures and hours of daylight in London and Sydney during the same weekend in December 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
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The charts depict the maximal and minimal temperatures
in
Change preposition
at
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 sunrise
an
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
 sunset in UK and
Sydney
Use synonyms
 from 28th
December
Use synonyms
 to 30th
December
Use synonyms
 in 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, the weather condition was warmer in
Sydney
Use synonyms
 than in
London
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. For both cities, the degree was highest in 30th and 29th in
Sydney
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 and
London
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 respectively.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 28th
December
Use synonyms
,
London
Use synonyms
's highest temperature was 9
degrees
Use synonyms
 and the lowest was 4
degrees
Use synonyms
. There was a sharp rise in daylight warmth to 13
degrees
Use synonyms
 the
next
Linking Words
 day.
Conversely
Linking Words
, the day after that, the weather cooled down to 10.
In addition
Linking Words
, there
was
Change the verb form
were
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 only around 4
degrees
Use synonyms
 in night hours but
this
Linking Words
 dropped to 3 on the 29th. It soared marginally on 30th
December
Use synonyms
.
Sydney
Use synonyms
 described a steady upward trend compared to
London
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. Friday was its most
plummet
Wrong verb form
plummeting
show examples
 point in temperatures with a maximal 26
degrees
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 and
minimal
Correct article usage
a minimal
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 17. There was a gradual rise
for
Change preposition
of
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 about 2
degrees
Use synonyms
 after it. The highest point hit on
30th
Correct article usage
the 30th
show examples
 with 31
degrees
Use synonyms
 in the daytime and 19
degrees
Use synonyms
 in the nighttime. In conclusion, it is obvious that the UK did not receive sunshine as much as
Sydney
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the temperatures measured on
December
Use synonyms
 30th were relatively highest in both nations.
Submitted by soesandioo.drssdo on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sydney, december, london, degrees with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • The tables compare
  • temperatures
  • hours of daylight
  • ranged from
  • consistently high
  • slight increase
  • remained stable
  • significantly fewer
  • enjoyed
  • overall
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