IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Most people do not care enough about environmental issues. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #care
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We can’t generalize the idea of all people neglecting the environmental problems, because it depends on the
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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 of
communities
Use synonyms
 and their knowledge. The environmental consciousness differs among
countries
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, and
this
Linking Words
 depends on several factors
such
Linking Words
 as community awareness, economic development, and governmental policies. Environmentally friendly
countries
Use synonyms
 are
countries
Use synonyms
 doing the most to protect the environment and working on having the least negative environmental impacts.
Moreover
Linking Words
, these
countries
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 are investing in increasing the knowledge and awareness of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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communities
Use synonyms
 against the harmful impacts related to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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environmental issues and it would affect the future generation. These
communities
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 are believing in sustainability and how to meet our own needs without compromising the ability of future generations to meet their own needs, that
why
Add a missing verb
is why
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 they care about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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environmental issues. South Korea is an example of
environmentally
Correct article usage
an environmentally
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 friendly country since they are following a circular economy
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 aims to
minimizes
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minimize
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 the total waste and utilize the most
of
Change preposition
apply
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resources
Correct pronoun usage
its resources
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, South Korea have a very
advance
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advanced
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 recycling system, not only used in the industrial
filed
Correct your spelling
field
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 but even
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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applied in the household. The Korean government were able to teach and educate their citizens and
residence
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residents
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 how to follow the rules of the system and how to apply
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, other
communities
Use synonyms
 are missing the basic knowledge related to environmental issues,
such
Linking Words
 as types of pollution. Mostly
Linking Words
this
Change the determiner
this community
these communities
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communities
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are belonged
Change to the active voice
belong
have belonged
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 to developing
countries
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, which
focusing
Wrong verb form
focus
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 more on how to build their economy rather than preserving the environment. The governments of these
countries
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 should start educating their people and
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
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 their level of environmental awareness.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they must implement
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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 policies on both the industrial and residential fields with apply some penalties and fines to motivate their people to apply
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
Submitted by MeMo 2000 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • prioritize
  • immediate needs
  • connect with
  • distant
  • abstract
  • economic considerations
  • growing awareness
  • active participation
  • initiatives
  • movements
  • impacts
  • well-being
What to do next:
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