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Band 5.5

today's school should teach their students how to survive financially in the world today. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#school #students #world
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In
this
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 contemporary epoch, financial
management
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 is a crucial sector in our daily life. Many people
argued
Wrong verb form
argue
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 that educational institutions must teach their
students
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 how they will save and cost
money
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 in the future. I am a strong advocate
in
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of
show examples
 the statement and I will depict it in
this
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 essay.
Firstly
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, learning
money
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management
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 skills from childhood is a great way for infants to
expense
Verb problem
spend
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money
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 wisely in adult age. We know that if any child learns anything in their boyhood they will carry it consistently in their future.
For instance
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, some offspring used to collect
money
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 in a piggy bank in their younger age and most of the time these children will have collected pennies in a bank when they will become adults.
Therefore
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, it is proved that learning
money
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management
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 from primary school will be a great approach for
students
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.
Similarly
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, from the very beginning of their educational journey,
students
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 used to obey their mentors.
For example
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, teachers have been teaching
students
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 lots of subjects like mathematics, history, science, geography etc for a hundred years or more and
students
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 are
also
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 consuming these subjects easily
according to
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 their teacher's advice. so,they are confident in their academic subject more than calculating assets in real life. If teachers include one more subject in the syllabus which is related to
money
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management
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then
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 it will be very significant for offspring after completing their graduation when they will have entered a practical life. In conclusion, without ,
money
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 the world is very difficult to live in so it's very important to pursue to know about financial
management
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.
However
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, I completely believe that educational institutions have a great influence
to teach
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on teaching
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students
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 about
this
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 factor.
Submitted by sporshiajyoti on

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coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion need to be more developed. Try to include a clear thesis statement in your introduction and summarize your main points in the conclusion.
task response
Make sure to fully address the task prompt by discussing both the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement. Provide a balanced argument with clear examples to support your points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial literacy
  • modern economy
  • student debt
  • mitigate
  • practical financial skills
  • budgeting
  • saving
  • investing
  • income inequality
  • psychological benefits
  • financial security
  • traditional education
  • financial independence
  • technology
  • personal finance management
  • global perspective
  • entrepreneurship
  • curriculum
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