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Band 5

Hosting international sporting competitions is good,but few people think this causes too many problems. Explain both views and tell your opinion.

#competitions #people
Some
people
 think, hosting a
sports
 competition at an international
level
 is a bad idea and not beneficial for the country whereas some
people
 show their interest in these
competitions
. According to me,
sports
 play an important role in the development of the country in one or
other
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
 way and for the promotion of these
games
, it is necessary to host various
competitions
 at the international
level
. On the one hand, by hosting international
sports
events
, some
people
 might get interested in
sports
 or maybe some
people
 stand on the opposite side but there are various benefits of these
competitions
.
Firstly
, these
events
 help an individual (sportsperson) in their personal growth in their particular sport and
also
 promote our
games
 at international
level
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
 instance, Kabbadi is the game which was played only by Indians but by these international
events
, the game has achieved the position at international
level
 and now it is played worldwide.
On the other hand
, by hosting these
competitions
, many
people
 might get attracted
towards
Change preposition
to
show examples
sports
. We can observe, children or students are least interested in playing physical
games
 and
sports
 because of developments in technology and
availability
Correct article usage
the availability
show examples
 of mobiles and
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
. Almost every child nowadays opts to play video
games
 rather than playing in the fields. So by hosting these
competitions
, it might be beneficial for them if they get attracted towards
sports
 which
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
 a great carrier for them. To conclude, It is necessary for either private companies or governments to host the international
sports
competitions
 which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 very important for the promotion of our
games
 as well as for the children to attract them towards physical activities. In my opinion, these
events
 are important as well as beneficial for
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
.
Submitted by anujinkiko on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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