Studies show that many people in the prison have low level of education. For this reason, some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate in prison, so that they can get a job when they leave prison. To what extent do you agree.

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There have been many studies carried out and it has been conducted that the majority of convicted criminals have the minimum level of education. Some

people

think that to reduce crime,

prisoners

should be educated while they are in jail in order to find a job when they are out of it. I strongly agree with

this

statement, because by doing

this

detainees will learn new

skills

and they will be shown a different approach to life.

Firstly

, criminals are put in prisons for committing crimes and they need to suffer the punishment given to them. Once they are out, they usually repeat the same thing again and everything goes in a vicious circle.

However

, if those criminals are taught new

skills

during confinement time, they are more likely to use those

skills

to find a job when they leave

prison

This

means that these

people

would be occupied doing something more valuable for themselves and society

instead

of committing

further

crimes.

For example

prisoners

in the UK learn

skills

such

as carpenter and housekeeping which they use these qualities to find jobs when they finish their sentence. Another reason why I strongly believe that

prisoners

should be educated in order to reduce crime is that they will be shown a different perspective to approach growth. Learning can broaden everyone's horizons. It questions why

people

take some actions in their lives, what went wrong and how to learn from our mistakes to improve things for the future.

For example

people

who had access to training during their

prison

time, when they have left

prison

, not only have not repeated committed crimes

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but have spoken out and influenced others about the right way to approach life. In conclusion, learning is essential for

prisoners

if we want crime to be reduced. It teaches them new

skills

which can be used outside the

prison

's life, it

also

, broaden one's horizon, it shows the right path that

people

should follow.

Submitted by rabie_0677 on Mon Feb 28 2022

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Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

326 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Studies show that many people in the prison have low level of education. For this reason, some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate in prison, so that they can get a job when they leave prison. To what extent do you agree.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that competition in work, school, and daily life is beneficial, while others argue that cooperation should be prioritized. Both approaches come with distinct advantages and disadvantages.

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems trying alternative medicine and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?