Some people think that governments should do more to make their citizens have a healthier diet. Others, however, believe that individuals should take responsibility for their own diet and health. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

As the pressure of working or studying is heavier, more and more

people

Use synonyms

get sick due to the unhealthy

diet

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

argue

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

whether

government

Use synonyms

need to play a role in helping residents have a healthier

diet

Use synonyms

or citizens need to take care

themselves

Change preposition

of themselves

show examples

for their own

diet

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss

this

Linking Words

issue from both sides. Some may propose that

government

Use synonyms

is important to do more to help residents have a healthier

diet

Use synonyms

. One possible reason is

Use synonyms

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

has the bigger authority to carry out some compulsory regulations.

For instance

Linking Words

Use synonyms

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

can stipulate all schools to provide

the

Correct article usage

show examples

healthy

diet

Use synonyms

for students. The diets need to include the most important nutrition

such

Linking Words

vitamin

Fix the agreement mistake

vitamins

show examples

carbohydrate

Fix the agreement mistake

carbohydrates

show examples

and protein every school day. Another reason is that

government

Use synonyms

can help citizens have

easier

Add an article

an easier

show examples

way to access

the

Correct article usage

show examples

healthy

diet

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

Use synonyms

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

can make sure the low prices for healthy

food

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as vegetables, fruits, eggs and various kinds of meat by the policy like maximum prices. In

this

Linking Words

way,

people

Use synonyms

have more chances to enjoy

the

Correct article usage

show examples

healthy

diet

Use synonyms

with the help of

Use synonyms

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

However

Linking Words

, other

people

Use synonyms

argue that

individuals

Use synonyms

need to take their own accountability for their

diet

Use synonyms

. One of

reasons

Add an article

the reasons

show examples

is only

individuals

Use synonyms

can supervise themselves.

Fix the agreement mistake

Individuals

show examples

Individual

Add an article

An individual

show examples

are more familiar

their

Change preposition

with their

show examples

health conditions and know which types of

food

Use synonyms

can eat or whether they are allergic to some

food

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, they can eat some healthy

food

Use synonyms

which is suitable for them. Another reason is

individuals

Use synonyms

are the

first

Linking Words

person to worry about their health

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

and they

also

Linking Words

should be the

first

Linking Words

person to make sure they

access

Add a missing verb

have access

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

healthier

food

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, I suppose

individuals

Use synonyms

need to take more responsibility for their own

diet

Use synonyms

compared with

Use synonyms

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

This

Linking Words

is because governments try to improve the health condition

from

Change preposition

show examples

whole

Add an article

the whole

show examples

society. It is impossible

Change preposition

for that

show examples

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

government

Use synonyms

can look after every single person.

Thus

Linking Words

individuals

Use synonyms

have more feasibility to achieve

the

Correct article usage

show examples

healthy

diet

Use synonyms

as they only need to take care

themselves

Change preposition

of themselves

show examples

59213142

Mar 2, 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

332 words

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Some people think that governments should do more to make their citizens have a healthier diet. Others, however, believe that individuals should take responsibility for their own diet and health. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their employees' lives easier?

Some experts believe that a second language should be taught at an early age. Do the advantages ouyweigh the disadvantages

Some countries have legal ages at which people can drink. Others believe not have strict law is a better policy. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Our personalities are predefined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing can be done to change our character traits to what extent do you agree?

Fast food is a part of life in many place. Some people think this has bad effects in lifestyle and diet. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons