Some people think the increasing business and cultural contact between countries brings many positive effects. Others say it causes the loss of national identities. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

In
this
global village,
exchanging
Wrong verb form
the exchange
show examples
of business and traditional values
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
become more common.
According to
a few,
this
has many affirmative effects
while
others think that it has certain drawbacks like losing self-identity. In my opinion, international business development and cultural knowledge transfer
contributes
Correct subject-verb agreement
contribute
show examples
to economic growth and bring the nations closer.
Firstly
, tie-ups between nations allow companies to sell their
products
globally which will lead them to contribute to the growth of the national economy. Because of
this
type of arrangement, the vendors can grab the buyers from an international market which leads them to generate more revenue. To illustrate, the sellers from India are exporting many agricultural
products
overseas and
likewise
importing metallic
products
from China.
Thus
, it aids the economy of both countries.
Secondly
, it has been observed that the cultural exchange programs bring people closer especially those belonging to totally different
traditions
. By exchanging their
traditions
not only do they learn amazing new things, but they
also
cultivate respect for each other.
For example
, many universities are running culture exploration programs and welcoming students from abroad so that they can demonstrate their values and in return bring ours with them.
However
, there are certain people who think
opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite
show examples
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
and believe that by doing
such
events, the national identities will be lost. They think that buying
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
products
from foreign countries will affect the GDP of the locals and eventually people would not buy from local sellers.
For example
, many prefer to buy foreign brands' garments,
hence
domestic money benefits international sellers.
Therefore
, in my opinion, exchanging values and the economy is beneficial to all participating nationals.
While
the government should promote both, they should
also
make sure that native
traditions
are not disregarded.
To conclude
, sending and receiving business
as well as
traditions
between global territories are becoming common practice these days. Certainly, it has many advantages;
however
, one must not forget their roots and stick to them.
Submitted by hvyas on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph contributes directly to the main argument and that the introduction and conclusion clearly present and summarize the main points.
task achievement
You have provided a well-structured response with a clear argument. Make sure to fully address the topic and support your ideas with specific examples.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • globalization
  • cultural exchange
  • economic growth
  • cultural homogenization
  • national identity
  • cultural diversity
  • international trade
  • investment opportunities
  • tolerance
  • cultural preservation
  • traditional values
  • global influence
  • cultural dilution
What to do next:
Look at other essays: