IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Leaders and directors in organizations are normally older people. Some people think having a younger leader would be better. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#leaders #directors #organizations #people #leader
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In
this
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 day and
age
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, contemporary attention has been placed on whether
leaders
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 with more
years
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 of
age
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 or younger directors are better for the management positions in corporations. I strongly believe that senior managers possess more advantages than their counterparts in leading an organization due to some reasons below.
To begin
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 with, it is not an exaggeration to say that seniors committed most of their life to the workplace. During the company development, they have faced multiple challenges, dealt with unexpected situations and witnessed various ups and downs.
This
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 means they possess a wide range of specialized knowledge and practical experiences to come up with solutions for any circumstances, which is not an advantage of younger
leaders
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.
Besides
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, choosing to work in the same place even at old
age
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 means that they are loyal to the place and would love to be a permanent part of the system. With that being said, managers with more
years
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 of
age
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 can lead a corporation more effectively, compared to the younger ones.
Furthermore
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, when it comes to the success of a company, it is the employees’ level of trust and respect in their manager that matters. Generally, senior
leaders
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 are less likely to encounter any difficulties gaining respect from other colleagues. To be more particular, they can maintain the stability and solidarity of a group since those
years
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 working alongside the staff provided them with a profound understanding of each member and a powerful voice in the workplace. Meanwhile, young individuals need to prove themselves worthy for the position and make efforts to gain trust from their employees. In conclusion, it is undeniable that some people may believe authority positions should be held by young
leaders
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.
However
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, I hold a firm belief that those managers with more
years
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 of
age
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 can operate an organization more effectively, due to the aforementioned reasons.
Submitted by tungpns1811 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • strategic foresight
  • emotional intelligence
  • demographics
  • innovative
  • mentorship
  • collaboration
  • adaptability
  • networking
  • holistic approach
  • intergenerational
  • visionary
  • inspire
  • progressive
  • technological acumen
  • agility
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