Some people believe zoos, where wild animals are kept in a man-made environment, should no longer exist in the twenty-first century. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #zoos #animals #environment #century

Many believe that zoos, keeping animals in the ambience of a fake natural habitat, need to be stopped in the modern age. A big debate is surfacing regarding the well-being of creatures in zoos.

This

essay

agree

Change the verb form

agrees

show examples

with the statement and will discuss certain drawbacks of animal display centres. The biggest reason why zoos are damaging

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is the fact that animals can not experience true liberty outside their homes. Fauna

are

Change the verb form

show examples

destined to be in the wild, and recreating their

narural

Correct your spelling

natural

habitat is not the same as letting them roam free.

For instance

, studies have shown that a great number of creatures held in captivity are more likely to develop disorders in their emotional state, due to the lack of freedom. Another vital reason is

low

Add an article

the low

show examples

quality of life that the fauna

are

Change the verb form

show examples

living in.

Although

this

does depend on the centre in which they are kept in, the vast majority of places that display creatures dismiss basic conditions in which a certain species should be kept. The improper way of taking care of species is,

unfortunately

Add the comma(s)

,unfortunately

show examples

an abundant occurrence. Corporations only build these constructions for the sole purpose of gaining profit,

thus

ignoring health regulations and conserving as much money as possible, leaving species to suffer. To sum up, I think that the masses agree on why these types of buildings are, in fact, creating adverse ramifications for the fauna inhabiting them. But people are still visiting them daily without worrying about the awful conditions in which they are held. In the future,

hopefully

Add a comma

,hopefully

show examples

constructions like these will be shutting down, and the public will be able to see that other forms of entertainment exist.

Submitted by Allazhar on Thu Mar 10 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. others believe children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There is a widely held view among some parents that upbringing kids with a sense of competition resulting in their progress in the future. Despite the fact that latest surveys indicate that if youngsters follow cooperation instead of competition, they will be more effective adults. In my point of view, internalization of collaborative habits can have a significant beneficial consequences in all aspects of their lives.
5.5
band
You are having problems with a neighbour’s animals because the fence between your properties is old and In poor repair. You want the neighbour to pay half the cost of building a new fence. Write a letter to your neighbour. In your letter say what the problems are explain how a new fence will solve the problems suggest that the neighbour pays half of the cost
I am writing a request for half payment to install a new separator.
6
band
Some people believe that children are responsible for their crimes and should be punished for them. Others think the parents are in charge and should be punished instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There is debate about children's crime and some people think that they should be punished for their behaviour. Others think that parents are responsible for their child's crime and they should be punished instead. I firmly support the second idea. I strongly believe that children are innocent and punishment of children due to their behaviour is a completely unacceptable idea to me.
<4
band
Millions of dollars are spent on research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?
There are lot of millions of dollars are paid for studying space every year, however some people belive that use money to improve the life on Earth is better. This essay agree with the first statement anh give some reasons.
5
band
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Of late , researches rely on the opinion that a new language should be taught to children from their very young age rather than waiting for the high school teachers to teach them. Studying a new language right from the initial days of life has its own pors and cons. This essay is on the opinion that the merits are worthy in order to neglect its drawbacks. The reasons for arriving to this point is explained below.

Some people believe zoos, where wild animals are kept in a man-made environment, should no longer exist in the twenty-first century. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. others believe children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that children are responsible for their crimes and should be punished for them. Others think the parents are in charge and should be punished instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Millions of dollars are spent on research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?