Some people believe that success in life comes from taking risks or chances. Others believe that success results from careful planning. In your opinion, what does success come from? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

It is believed
by
Change preposition
that
show examples
some individuals
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
who consider becoming successful
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
totally
depend
Correct subject-verb agreement
depends
show examples
on our risk-taking ability and chances whilst others believe luck and people should plan the
future
carefully.
Therefore
, I will clarify my viewpoint with examples and reasons in the forthcoming paragraphs To commence with the view that pupils can achieve their targets
due to
luck, struggle and other measurements. To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, hard work is the key to success and they consider,
if
Correct word choice
that if
show examples
they
failed
Wrong verb form
fail
show examples
in their
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
or studies
so
Rephrase
apply
show examples
, they should do it again and again till
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
achievements of their goals.
For example
, a survey report
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
conducted by a successful entrepreneur in the USA, 50% of dwellers achieve their goals by taking risks.
Consequently
, the struggle is a necessity without struggle masses cannot take a single step in their lives. Moving
further
to another view
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
some individuals find that planning is most imperative for
future
prospects.
In other words
, thinking before becoming successful can help everyone to face any critical situation which can make their time complicated.
Moreover
, by planning they can solve everything in less time without making errors and can be able to get good grades in life which can aid them to make their
future
bright.
For instance
, the vast majority of people have succeeded by
following
this
type of procedure.
As a result
,
firstly
, setting up the way is
remarkably
Rephrase
more
show examples
essential than other things.
To conclude
, I reiterate that self-planning is demanded before choosing the right path
destinations
Fix the agreement mistake
destination
show examples
of the bright ultimate
future
but others consider having risks and chances can push them to complete their dreams.
Submitted by ankeshsaini100 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they lack clarity and structure. Work on making them more coherent and relevant to the topic.
task achievement
The response addresses the task, but it lacks depth and clarity. Ensure to provide a comprehensive response with clear and well-supported ideas.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: