IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Some people think children’s spending time on TV, video and PC games is good, while others think it is bad. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children’s #time #tv #video #pc #games
The table shows the opening date, the length of the route and the
number
 of commuters per year of the underground railway systems in six different cities. They are ordered from the oldest to the newest. In general, the older the railway system is the more kilometres of
route
Add an article
the route
a route
show examples
 it has. The only exception is Kyoto's which was built earlier than Los Angeles' but its length is less than a half of the latter's,
what
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 makes the underground Railway system of Kyoto the shortest one.
On the other hand
, London's subway is the longest by far, almost doubling Paris', which is the
second
 in length. The subways with the higher
number
 of passengers per year are in the cities of London, Paris and Tokyo. The rest of the undergrounds have a
substancially
Correct your spelling
substantially
 smaller
number
 of annual commuters. Even
suming
Correct your spelling
summing
 up the passengers of them all the figure is smaller than the
number
 of commuters of Paris.
Submitted by ignaciogigli on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: