Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

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Even
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though
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thought
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though
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there is a popular agreement that
sports
and social
activities
are not as important as classes and libraries and should not receive equal financial
support
, I have a different opinion. I strongly believe that they should equal financial
support
. The basis of my opinion is social and medical perspectives. Medically, funding money on
sports
and social
activities
will help
students
grow healthier which means
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
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their health as well as
decreases
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decreasing
show examples
mortality rates. Nowadays, a lot of people try to do
work life
Add a hyphen
work-life
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balance but not
may
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many
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people can do
this
. When
stressful
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stress
show examples
is accumulated, it can lead to some diseases in the future
such
as Depression , Hypertension and Anxiety. Along with
this
, improving
sports
and social
activities
by
receive
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receiving
show examples
equal financial
support
encourage the
students
to release some
stressed
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stress
show examples
. My personal experience is a compelling illustration of
this
. For the past 3 years, my younger sister
was diagnosed
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has diagnosed
show examples
Depression
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with Depression
show examples
because of the pressure of her school. She got
a
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apply
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treatment and took some medicine for a while until she is getting better.
Furthermore
, while she got treatment, she tried to take care of herself by
went
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going
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for
an
Correct article usage
apply
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exercise and
met
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meeting
show examples
new
friends
.
As a result
, Medically, funding money on
sports
and social
activities
will definitely
has
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have
show examples
a positive impact not only
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on students
show examples
students
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students'
student's
show examples
health but
also
on their life spans.
For
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From
show examples
a social
Correct your spelling
standpoint
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stand point
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standpoint
show examples
, spending money on
sports
and social
activities
will strengthen their bonds with other
students
which mean they can share
emotional
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emotions
show examples
and feelings, so they will grow closer to each other.
Correct your spelling
Indeed
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In deed
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Indeed
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, If
students
involve themselves in
sports
and social
activities
, they will create memories of beautiful
friends
. For
instant
Add an article
an instant
show examples
, when I was a college student, I attended a basketball team of my major. I had a chance to make
friends
with other
major
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majors
show examples
. Now we
are still keep
Change the verb form
still keep
show examples
in touch and share our lives. If I would not attend the basketball team, I would not have new
friends
.
Therefore
, socially, supporting
sports
and social
activities
obviously directly relates to improving
students
’ interpersonal skills. In conclusion, for all the reasons stated above, I encourage all universities and colleges
support
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to support
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sports
and social
activities
and receive equal financial
support
as libraries. If they do
this
,
then
they will discover
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
that supporting
sports
and social
activities
has a countless number of social and medical benefits.
Submitted by mafrey_playgirl on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • well-rounded education
  • physical fitness
  • mental well-being
  • reduce stress
  • productivity
  • social skills
  • networking
  • professional networks
  • career opportunities
  • reputation
  • vibrant campus life
  • life skills
  • character building
  • teamwork
  • leadership
  • time management
  • resilience
  • equal financial support
  • extracurricular activities
  • diverse interests
  • inclusivity
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