IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some parents buy their children whatever they ask for, and allow their children to do whatever they want. Is this a good way to raise children? What consequences could this style of parenting have for children as they get older? Write 250 words.

#parents #children #consequences #style
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I can say that parenting is
skill
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the skill
a skill
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 with no formal education. Why
it's
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is it's
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 skill? because
there's
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there are
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 no general parenting patterns for
children
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. Especially, because the
children
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 are human with
free
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a free
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 spirit and free will.
Moreover
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, when they are growing up, they can use their brain and
emotional
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emotions
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 to decided something, that they
toght
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thought
taught
,
best
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is best
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 for them. So, as
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
a parent
parents
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parents
Use synonyms
 how to prepare our
children
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 with the best ability to help them in the
next
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 future? Some
parents
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 choose to show their endless love for
the
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their
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children
Use synonyms
 by giving them everything they want. There is no strict rule for them
,
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apply
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 because maybe the
parents
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 argue that
children
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 will learn something from what they decided.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
, they put the wrong choice, they will know it and learn from that mistake.
Furthermore
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, there are
also
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 some
parents
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 who didn't want to make bad
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memories
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memorise
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memories
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 with their
children
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. So that, they give complete freedom
for
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to
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 the
children
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. In my
oppinion
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opinion
,
this
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 type of parenting
paterns
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patterns
 is not completely good. Because
children
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 need to be learned how to make
a
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the
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 best decision with all the capability we have.
Linking Words
Moreover
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,Moreover
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 when we are in
the
Correct article usage
a
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 difficult situation and have limited resources,
they
Correct pronoun usage
we
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 must be learned to be
patiens
Correct your spelling
patient
patients
 and how to make
priority
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a priority
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. While the
children
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 always get what they want, it might
made
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be made
make
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 them become
demanding
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a demanding
the demanding
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person
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people
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. Overall,
parents
Use synonyms
 need to be the best example figure for their
children
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. Even we love them unconditionally, but teach them about sharing, caring, patients, and struggling are very
usefull
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useful
 for them to have a good personality and be the best person in the future.
Hopefully
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,Hopefully
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 they will be
an
Correct article usage
apply
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independent,
thoughtfull
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thoughtful
 and bring
hapinness
Correct your spelling
happiness
for
Change preposition
to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
Submitted by miarosmia8 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
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  • responsibility
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