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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Different types of robots are now being developed which can be a friend, help at work and at school. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#robots #friend #work #school #development
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In our development region are has been changed faster and faster and there is a part of different kinds of technologies are invented.
This
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 essay will argue that
robots
Use synonyms
 are able to assist people at work and school,
as well as
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this
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 thesis,
this
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 thesis has benefits and drawbacks points.
To begin
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 with
advantage
Correct article usage
the advantage
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 side, personally, from my perspective, plenty of developing communities have well-known technology and they are improving day by day. The main reason is that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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modern
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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 of technology discovered and invented a property of different
sort
Fix the agreement mistake
sorts
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 of devices
such
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 as first of all
robots
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, mobile phones, computers, and so many gadgets which is so useful and crucial tools. There are a lot of circumstances in that
robots
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 are able to do everything that people can do,
for example
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, washing clothes, dishes and tidying up a house
as well as
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 even
thay
Correct your spelling
they
 can teach everything that teachers do.
In addition
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 to
this
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, the modern types of
robots
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 are controlled by humans, because, the population invented the technology before.
In contrast
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, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 some disadvantages thesis, one of the most controversial issues facing today's world is to have a robot in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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. The big trouble is that being lazy, as people know it the
robots
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 are able to do anything
instead
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 of human's works.
For instance
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, there is a piece of
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
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 for
robots
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such
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 as doing house chores, teaching students, driving cars and like that.
As a result
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, if the robot does it
instead
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 of humans, the majority of society
has
Wrong verb form
will have
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 many problems with employment,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society
is
Verb problem
will
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 not able to find a job and it will be complex in the future life.
To sum up
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, from my point of view, in growth the public should limit some rules.
Although
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 it is hard to do they should
decide
Verb problem
make
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 a decision regarding certain and optional programs. If
robots
Use synonyms
 do things that humans can not do it. it would be the best way for the land.
Submitted by Weallneedit9 on

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task achievement
Clarify your argument in the introduction and ensure it aligns with your conclusion. The essay's stance on whether robot development is positive or negative is unclear.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between paragraphs and connect your ideas more cohesively. Transitions between points can be smoother.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or illustrations to back your arguments about the advantages and disadvantages of robots.
task achievement
You've managed to discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of using robots, which demonstrates an understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, providing a clear structure for your thoughts.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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