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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

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Introduction
Economic
improvements
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 are seen as the most significant means of
development
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 by
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 important number of
governments
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. While, some individuals believe that there are other ways of progress, which are as important as
Use synonyms
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
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. As a citizen, I believe that
governments
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 should focus on different subjects related to
future
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improvements
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 equally.
Body · 1
It seems like money has the most critical place for the
development
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 of
countries
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; because, without decent financial support, goals for
country
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development
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 may not be achieved and the
country
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 may lose their gunpower.
Finance
Add an article
The finance
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 sector is a power source for other areas like education or a powerful army. Without
this
Linking Words
support
Add a comma
,support
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 the related branches may struggle and cannot develop.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, insufficiency in gunpower threatens the
future
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 of the
country
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. And, without a
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future
Add a comma
,future
show examples
 no
improvements
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 can be done.
Nevertheless
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, the structure of the
countries
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 and
governments
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 are more complex than
this
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.
Body · 2
In a strong
country
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 with
avaliable
Correct your spelling
available
 power for
future
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Use synonyms
improvements
Add a comma
,improvements
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 all different parts should be supported equally.
However
Linking Words
, the
economy
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 seems the most important part it has many subdivisions related to other subjects.
For example
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, computer or mobile phone export is a major source for the United States,
bcause
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because
this
Linking Words
country
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 supports scientific research which has significant importance on economic progress.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, human rights and different ideas should
also
Linking Words
 be supported, which is at least as important as
Use synonyms
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
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.
For instance
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, many
well educated
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well-educated
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 people immigrate from
countries
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 with huge economies, like China or India, to places with smaller economies, like Europe.
As a result
Linking Words
, without the support of those people
countries
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 like China or India struggles with economic
development
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.
Conclusion
In conclusion, the
economy
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 should be well supported;
however
Linking Words
,
governments
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 must see the importance of other subjects like science or human rights on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
financial progress.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • sustainable development
  • social equality
  • environmental degradation
  • cultural heritage
  • technological innovation
  • wealth disparity
  • human development index
  • holistic approach
  • quality of life
  • economic prosperity
  • healthcare system
  • education system
  • cultural diversity
  • policy decisions
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