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Band 5

We live today in an electronic information age. It is easier to be connected by technology yet many people seem to no closer to feeling happy in their lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#information #age #technology #people #lives
It is real that we are living in the era of electronic information
that
Correct word choice
and
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 we can not doubt that it is easier to be connected to
with
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apply
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technology
;
however
, the involvement of
technology
 still
left
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leaves
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 many
people
left to live
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living
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 no closer to feeling happy. In a personal view, I absolutely agree with these thoughts and
This
 essay will discuss these problems.
Firstly
, nowadays
technology
 is not only improving the way
how
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apply
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people
 communicate with each other, but
technology
also
 gives
people
 more access to something that they never got before;
for instance
, 20 years ago it was impossible to order vegetables within minutes from home, but now, even ordering a car can be done with a phone and will be sent right in front of your house in hours, or even minutes.
On the other hand
, as social beings, humans need to have interaction with other humans. Sadly,
the
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apply
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technologies can not replace the way
how
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apply
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humans interact naturally and even make it harder for them to communicate physically;
for example
, in
this
 pandemic situation, a lot of
people
 feel awkward communicating in video meetings and turn out to be depressed, yet they can still communicate with each other in virtual form. In conclusion,
the
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apply
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technologies will develop throughout the years, but the way
how
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apply
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people
 communicate with each other can not change. It is not the
people
's fault that they feel less happy in their lives, it is the technological development that sometimes
did
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does
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 not understand how human as social beings works.
Submitted by Wildanathar5 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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